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No animals were eaten, killed, maimed, wounded, slightly
injured, experimented on, tortured, eaten, sacrificed, frightened,
bullied, teased, humiliated, tickled, upset, ravished, tantalized,
pulled out of a hat, dishonoured or criticised during the making of this
website. Some jokes however were severely tortured in an effort to make
them funny. |
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Welcome to our archive of jokes, riddles, poems and .
. . everything!!!
Over the years we have published over 100,000 jokes,
50,000 poems, 40,000 riddles, 20,000 pictures, 10,000 funny articles
and 2 combine harvesters.
So have a look around, enjoy and get those crops cut
as soon as possible!!!
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Joke Archive : 100,000 Fabulously Amusing Jokes |
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Archive of funny slippers uk and other funny jokes |
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Funny Joke Online
A man was on his first business trip to Japan, and he decided to check out the local Whore House. He walked in and was assigned a young girl with a body that got him 'up' immediately. As soon as they reached the room, he started ripping her clothes off and going to town. Moaning and grunting, the girl was screaming in Japanese, 'Wasukima! Wasukima!' He was sure that she was praising him for his good job, so he kept going harder than ever. Later, he went golfing with his boss and a few clients. As the clients were Japanese, he decided to impress them with his new knowledge of their language. When one of them got a hole in one, he raised his arms and shouted 'Wasukima!'. All of the men looked at him quizzically, and one of them asked, 'Why are you shouting 'wrong hole'?'
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Cow Joke
What two members of the cow family go everywhere with you? Your calves!
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Funny Kids Joke
How do you make a butterfly?Flick it out of the butter dish with a knife!
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Dentist Joke
A patient came to his dentist with problems with his teeth. Patient: Doctor, I have yellow teeth, what do I do? Dentist: Wear a brown tie!
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College Humor
Why did the man cross the road?Because his penis told him to. or Because he thought he could get laid if he did. or So the woman driving down the street could hit him. (You know us women, we just can't drive worth shit. . . ) or Because another man dared him to and called him a pussy.
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Simple Joke
Why did the condom fly across the room?? It got pissed off!!!
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Drunks Joke
There was a young Scotsman called Andy, Who knocked over his bottle of Shandy. He lifted his kilt, To wipe up what he spilt, And the barmaid said, 'Blimey! That's handy!'
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Bar Joke , beer, booze and fun!
A guy walks into a bar and orders a beer. He only brought enough money for one beer though. As he's drinking his beer, which was quite expensive, he realizes how bad he has to go to the bathroom. Not wanting anyone to drink his expensive beer, he takes out a 3x5 note card and writes on it, 'I SPIT IN THIS BEER', and walks to the bathroom. When he comes back about 15 minutes later, there's another 3x5 note card next to his beer saying, 'I SPIT IN IT TOO'.
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Note : Many of our jokes have been
submitted by guests - if you find any that are offensive please let
us know and they will be removed immediately. |
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