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No animals were eaten, killed, maimed, wounded, slightly
injured, experimented on, tortured, eaten, sacrificed, frightened,
bullied, teased, humiliated, tickled, upset, ravished, tantalized,
pulled out of a hat, dishonoured or criticised during the making of this
website. Some jokes however were severely tortured in an effort to make
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Welcome to our archive of jokes, riddles, poems and .
. . everything!!!
Over the years we have published over 100,000 jokes,
50,000 poems, 40,000 riddles, 20,000 pictures, 10,000 funny articles
and 2 combine harvesters.
So have a look around, enjoy and get those crops cut
as soon as possible!!!
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Joke Archive : 100,000 Fabulously Amusing Jokes |
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Archive of funny play scripts and other funny jokes |
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Blonde Joke - 2
Q: How many blondes does it take to play Hide and Seek? A: One.
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Birthday Joke
Fred: Do you like the dictionary I bought you for your birthday? Harry: Sure. It's a great present but I just can't find the words to thank you enough.
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Movie and TV Joke
Q: How many movie directors does it take to change a lightbulb? A: Just one, but he wants to do it thirty-two times and when he's done everyone thinks that his last lightbulb was much better.
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Ethnic Humor
A visitor from Holland was chatting with his American friend and was jokingly explaining about the red, white and blue in the Netherlands flag. 'Our flag symbolizes our taxes, ' he said. 'We get red when we talk about them, white when we get our tax bill, and blue after we pay them. ' 'That's the same with us, ' the American said, 'only we see stars, too. '
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Short Stupid Joke
Non stick Cellotape Solar Powered Flash Light A black highlighter pen Glow in the dark sunglasses Inflatable Anchor Smooth Sandpaper Waterproof sponge Waterproof Teabags AC adapter for Solar powered calculators Fireproof Matches Fireproof Cigarettes Battery powered Battery Charger Seatbelts for Motorbikes Hand powered Chainsaw Inflatable Dartboard Silent Alarm Clock A Pedal powered wheelchair Braille Drivers Manual Double sided playing cards Ejector seats for Helicopters
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Sporting Joke
Jane had been driving 16 hours straight and was still at least six hours away from her destination. It was almost eight o'clock in the morning and she was very tired. After dozing off and nearly crashing into a telephone pole, she decided to pull onto a side road and rest. Jane turned off the car and closed her eyes . . . drifting off to sleep, precious sleep . . . When an old man in a bright blue jogging suit knocked on her window, scaring her half to death. 'Sorry to wake you,' he huffed, jogging in place. 'But can you tell me what time it is?' Jane glanced at her watch. '8:15,' she said through the glass. The old man thanked her, then left. 'Just my luck,' she muttered. 'I'm parked on someone's jogging route. ' With a sigh, she settled back into her seat and tried to fall asleep. Two male joggers in their thirties knocked on her window. If she hadn't been dead tired, she would have found them cute. Now, they were just annoying. 'Hi,' the blond jogger said. 'Do you have the time?' his brown-haired friend asked. Jane sighed and looked at her watch. '8:19,' she said. 'Thanks,' they said, then jogged off. Jane looked down the road and saw more joggers coming her way. Irritated, she retrieved a pen from the glove box and scrawled 'I DO NOT KNOW THE TIME' on the back of a magazine. She put the hastily constructed sign in the window and settled back to sleep. A thin, pale jogger knocked on the window just as she started dozing off. Jane pointed at the sign and shouted, 'Can't you read?' To which he replied, 'Sure I can, ma'am. I just wanted to let you know: It's 8:27. '
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Horse Joke
A young boy told his mother that his father had taken him to the zoo. The mother couldn't believe it. She said, 'Your father has never taken anyone to the zoo in his whole life. ' The boy said, 'He did, and one of the animals paid fifty dollars!'
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Funny College Joke
What does the N on the Nebraska football helmet stand for? 'Nowledge. '
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Note : Many of our jokes have been
submitted by guests - if you find any that are offensive please let
us know and they will be removed immediately. |
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