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No animals were eaten, killed, maimed, wounded, slightly
injured, experimented on, tortured, eaten, sacrificed, frightened,
bullied, teased, humiliated, tickled, upset, ravished, tantalized,
pulled out of a hat, dishonoured or criticised during the making of this
website. Some jokes however were severely tortured in an effort to make
them funny. |
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Welcome to our archive of jokes, riddles, poems and .
. . everything!!!
Over the years we have published over 100,000 jokes,
50,000 poems, 40,000 riddles, 20,000 pictures, 10,000 funny articles
and 2 combine harvesters.
So have a look around, enjoy and get those crops cut
as soon as possible!!!
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Joke Archive : 100,000 Fabulously Amusing Jokes |
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Archive of funny photo software and other funny jokes |
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Doctor and nurse Joke
1) Why did the nurse keep the bedpan in the refrigerator? Because when she kept it in the freezer it took too much skin off.
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Horse Joke
When does a horse neigh? Whinny wants to!
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Waiter Joke
Waiter, waiter! There's a mosquito in my soup. Don't worry sir, mosquitoes have very small appetites !
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Situations Humor
A little town had a high birth rate that had attracted the attention of the sociologists at the state university. They wrote a grant proposal; got a huge chunk of money; hired a few additional sociologists, anthropologist and a family planning and birth control specialist; moved to town; rented offices; set up their computers; got squared away; and began designing their questionnaires and such. While the staff was busy getting ready for their big research effort, the project director decided to go to the local drugstore for a cup of coffee. He sat down at the counter, ordered his coffee, and while he was drinking it, he told the druggist what his purpose was in town, then asked him if he had any idea why the birth rate was so high. 'Sure, ' said the druggist. 'Every morning the six o'clock train comes through here and blows for the crossing. It wakes everybody up, and, well, it's too late to go back to sleep, and it's too early to get up. '
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Vampire Joke
What do you get if you cross Dracula with AI Capone? A fangster.
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Cow Joke
What animals do you bring to bed? Your calves.
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Situations Humor
A woman who had been married twice and divorced twice was fed up. Her first husband beat her, and her second husband ran away with another woman. Plus, she couldn't find a new lover who could satisfy her sexually, so she put an ad in the classifieds: Wanted: A good looking, single guy who won't beat me, won't leave me, and is good in bed. About a week later, her doorbell rings. She opens the door to find a man with no arms and legs on her front porch. 'I'm here about your ad, ' he says. 'You must be mistaken, ' she says. 'Let me explain, ' he says. 'I can't beat you, I don't have any arms. And I can't run away because I don't have any legs. ' 'But, ' she asks, 'How do I know you're good in bed?' 'I rang the doorbell, didn't I?'
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Ouch Joke
A hunter visited another hunter and was given a tour of his home. In the den was a stuffed lion. The visiting hunter asked, 'When did you bag him?'The host said proudly, 'That was three years ago, when I went hunting with my ex-wife. ''What's he stuffed with, ' asked the visiting hunter. 'My ex-wife' replied the hunter.
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Note : Many of our jokes have been
submitted by guests - if you find any that are offensive please let
us know and they will be removed immediately. |
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