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Welcome to our archive of jokes, riddles, poems and .
. . everything!!!
Over the years we have published over 100,000 jokes,
50,000 poems, 40,000 riddles, 20,000 pictures, 10,000 funny articles
and 2 combine harvesters.
So have a look around, enjoy and get those crops cut
as soon as possible!!!
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Joke Archive : 100,000 Fabulously Amusing Jokes |
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Archive of funny phone jokes and other funny jokes |
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Computers Joke
TOP10. Subject: Gullibility Virus alert (fwd) ****************************************************************** WARNING, CAUTION, DANGER, AND BEWARE! Gullibility Virus Spreading over the Internet! ****************************************************************** WASHINGTON, D. C. --The Institute for the Investigation of Irregular Internet Phenomena announced today that many Internet users are becoming infected by a new virus that causes them to believe without question every groundless story, legend, and dire warning that shows up in their inbox or on their browser. The Gullibility Virus, as it is called, apparently makes people believe and forward copies of silly hoaxes relating to cookie recipes, email viruses, taxes on modems, and get-rich-quick schemes. 'These are not just readers of tabloids or people who buy lottery tickets based on fortune cookie numbers, ' a spokesman said. 'Most are otherwise normal people, who would laugh at the same stories if told to them by a stranger on a street corner. ' However, once these same people become infected with the Gullibility Virus, they believe anything they read on the Internet. 'My immunity to tall tales and bizarre claims is all gone, ' reported one weeping victim. 'I believe every warning message and sick child story my friends forward to me, even though most of the messages are anonymous. ' Another victim, now in remission, added, 'When I first heard about Good Times, I just accepted it without question. After all, there were dozens of other recipients on the mail header, so I thought the virus must be true. ' It was a long time, the victim said, before she could stand up at a Hoaxees Anonymous meeting and state, 'My name is Jane, and I've been hoaxed. ' Now, however, she is spreading the word. 'Challenge and check whatever you read, ' she says. Internet users are urged to examine themselves for symptoms of the virus, which include the following: The willingness to believe improbable stories without thinking; The urge to forward multiple copies of such stories to others; A lack of desire to take three minutes to check to see if a story is true. D. S. is an example of someone recently infected. He told one reporter, 'I read on the Net that the major ingredient in almost all shampoos makes your hair fall out, so I've stopped using shampoo. ' When told about the Gullibility Virus, D. S. said he would stop reading email, so that he would not become infected. Anyone with symptoms like these is urged to seek help immediately. Experts recommend that at the first feelings of gullibility, Internet users rush to their favorite search engine and look up the item tempting them to thoughtless credence. Most hoaxes, legends, and tall tales have been widely discussed and exposed by the Internet community. Courses in critical thinking are also widely available, and there is online help from many sources, including 2]Department of Energy Computer Incident Advisory Capability 3]Symantec Anti Virus Research Center 4]McAfee Associates Virus Hoax List 5]Dr. Solomons Hoax Page 6]The Urban Legends Web Site 7]Urban Legends Reference Pages 8]Datafellows Hoax Warnings Those people who are still symptom free can help inoculate themselves against the Gullibility Virus by reading some good material on evaluating sources, such as Evaluating Internet Research Sources at http://www. sccu. edu/faculty/R_Harris/evalu8it. htm Evaluation of Information Sources at http://www. vuw. ac. nz/~agsmith/evaln/evaln. htm Bibliography on Evaluating Internet Resources at http://refserver. lib. vt. edu/libinst/critTHINK. HTM Lastly, as a public service, Internet users can help stamp out the Gullibility Virus by sending copies of this message to anyone who forwards them a hoax. ********************************************************************** This message is so important, we're sending it anonymously! Forward it to all your friends right away! Don't think about it! This is not a chain letter! This story is true! Don't check it out! This story is so timely, there is no date on it! This story is so important, we're using lots of exclamation points! For every message you forward to some unsuspecting person, the Home for the Hopelessly Gullible will donate ten cents to itself. (If you wonder how the Home will know you are forwarding these messages all over creation, you're obviously thinking too much. ) **********************************************************************
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Music Joke
Q: Why did the bass player get mad at the timpanist? A: He turned a peg and wouldn't tell the bass player which one.
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Legal Humor
A lawyer named Strange died, and his friend asked the tombstone maker to inscribe on his tombstone, 'Here lies Strange, an honest man, and a lawyer. ' The inscriber insisted that such an inscription would be confusing, for passersby would tend to think that three men were buried under the stone. However he suggested an alternative: He would inscribe, 'Here lies a man who was both honest and a lawyer. That way, whenever anyone walked by the tombstone and read it, they would be certain to remark: 'That's Strange!'
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Situations Humor
A guy's on the electric chair. The warden's just about to pull the switchwhen the guy gets the hiccups. The warden says, 'Do you have any lastrequests?' The guy says, '(hic) Yeah. . . (hic) could you please do (hic)could you please do something to scare me?'
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Funny Joke
Knock, knock! Who's there? George Washington! George Washington who? George Washington who? Didn't you learn anything in history class?
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Dog Joke - 1
What do you get if you cross a computer and a Rottweiller ? A computer with a lot of bites !
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Joke for Speeches
How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb?a: What's a light bulb?
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Cat Joke
Why do black cats never shave ? Because 8 out of 10 cats prefer whiskas !
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Note : Many of our jokes have been
submitted by guests - if you find any that are offensive please let
us know and they will be removed immediately. |
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