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No animals were eaten, killed, maimed, wounded, slightly
injured, experimented on, tortured, eaten, sacrificed, frightened,
bullied, teased, humiliated, tickled, upset, ravished, tantalized,
pulled out of a hat, dishonoured or criticised during the making of this
website. Some jokes however were severely tortured in an effort to make
them funny. |
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Welcome to our archive of jokes, riddles, poems and .
. . everything!!!
Over the years we have published over 100,000 jokes,
50,000 poems, 40,000 riddles, 20,000 pictures, 10,000 funny articles
and 2 combine harvesters.
So have a look around, enjoy and get those crops cut
as soon as possible!!!
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Joke Archive : 100,000 Fabulously Amusing Jokes |
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Archive of funny pacifiers and other funny jokes |
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Military Joke
Q. What do Baghdad and Hiroshima have in common ? A. Nothing, yet.
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Instrument Joke
Q: What is the range of a tuba?A: Twenty yards if you've got a good arm. Q: What's a tuba for?A: 1 1/2 X 3 1/2. Q: There are two tubaplayers sitting in a car. Who's driving?A: The policemanTuba Player: Did you hear my last recital?Friend: I hope so. Q: How many tuba players does it take to change a light bulb?A: Three: one to hold the bulb and two to drink until the room spins. Q: How do you fix a broken tuba?A: With a 'tuba glue. '
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Bumper Stickers - 7
They didn't let me out, they just gave me a day pass!
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Joke for Halloween
A police officer came upon a terrible wreck where the driver and passenger had been killed. As he looked upon the wreckage a little monkey came out of the brush and hopped around the crashed car. The officer looked down at the monkey and said, 'I wish you could talk. 'The monkey looked up at the officer and shook his head up and down. 'You can understand what I'm saying?' asked the officer. Again, the monkey shook his head up and down. 'Well, did you see this?''Yes, ' motioned the monkey. 'What happened?'The monkey pretended to have a can in his hand and turned it up by his mouth. 'They were drinking?' asked the officer. The monkey shakes his head 'Yes. ''What else?'The monkey pinched his fingers together and held them to his mouth. 'They were smoking marijuana?'The monkey shakes his head 'Yes. ''What else?'The monkey motioned 'kissing. ''They were kissing, too?' asked the astounded officer. The monkey shakes his head 'Yes. ''Now wait, you're saying your owners were drinking, smoking and kissing before they wrecked. 'The monkey shakes his head 'Yes. ''What were you doing during all this?''Driving' motioned the monkey.
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Dirty Joke
On the first day of college, the Dean addressed the students, pointing out some of the rules, saying, 'The female dormitory will be out-of-bounds for all male students, and the male dormitory to the female students. Anyone caught breaking this rule once will be fined $50. ' He continued, 'Anyone caught breaking this rule a second time will be fined $150. Being caught a third time will incur a hefty fine of $400. Are there any questions?' At this point, a male student in the crowd inquired, 'How much for a season pass?'
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Dog Joke - 2
Q: What side of the dog has the most fur? - A: The Outside.
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Travel and tourist Joke
Room service? Send up a larger room.
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Bumper Stickers - 4
If assholes could fly, this place would be an airport.
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Note : Many of our jokes have been
submitted by guests - if you find any that are offensive please let
us know and they will be removed immediately. |
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