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No animals were eaten, killed, maimed, wounded, slightly
injured, experimented on, tortured, eaten, sacrificed, frightened,
bullied, teased, humiliated, tickled, upset, ravished, tantalized,
pulled out of a hat, dishonoured or criticised during the making of this
website. Some jokes however were severely tortured in an effort to make
them funny. |
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Welcome to our archive of jokes, riddles, poems and .
. . everything!!!
Over the years we have published over 100,000 jokes,
50,000 poems, 40,000 riddles, 20,000 pictures, 10,000 funny articles
and 2 combine harvesters.
So have a look around, enjoy and get those crops cut
as soon as possible!!!
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Joke Archive : 100,000 Fabulously Amusing Jokes |
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Archive of funny motorbike crashes and other funny jokes |
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Horse Joke
How do you hire a horse? Put a brick under each hoof!
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Bumper Stickers - 1
Honk if you love peace and quiet.
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Bar Joke - 2
Three vampires walk into a bar and sit down at a table. The waitress comes over and asks the first vampire what he would like. The first vampire responds, 'I vould like some blood. '
The waitress turns to the second vampire and asks what he would like. The vampire responds, 'I vould like some blood. '
The waitress turns to the third vampire and asks what he would like. The vampire responds, 'I vould like some plasma. '
The waitress looks up and says, 'Let me see if I have this order correct. You want two bloods and a blood light?'
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Clean Humor
Q: What did they name the offspring of a blonde and a Puerto Rican?A: Retardo.
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Halloween Joke
Where do ghoulies go to on the day before Halloween party? To the boo-ty parlour.
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Dirty Joke
Harry approached a prostitute and asked, 'How much for a blow job ?'. 'Hundred Bucks'. 'OK', he said and began to jerk off. 'What the hell are you doing that for?' 'For hundred bucks you don't think I'm going to give you the easy one, do you ?'
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Funny College Joke
Bill Clinton steps out onto the White House lawn in the dead of winter. Right in front of him, on the White House lawn, he sees 'The President Must Die' written in urine across the snow. Well, old Bill is pretty ticked off. He storms into his security staff's HQ, and yells 'Somebody wrote a death threat in the snow on the front lawn! And they wrote it in urine! The guy had to be standing right on the porch when he did it! Where were you guys?!'The security guys stay silent and stare ashamedly at the floor. Bill hollers 'Well, don't just sit there! Get out and FIND OUT WHO DID IT! I want an answer, and I want it TONIGHT!'The entire staff immediately jump up and race for the exits. Later that evening, his chief security officer approaches him and says 'Well Mr. President, we have some bad news and we have some REALLY bad news. Which do you want first?'Clinton says 'Give me the bad news first. 'The officer says 'Well, we took a sample of the urine and tested it. The results just came back, and it was Al Gore's urine. 'Clinton says 'I feel so. . . so. . . betrayed! My own vice president!. . . Well, what's the REALLY bad news?'The officer replies 'Well, it's Hillary's handwriting. '
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Burger Joke
Why do the hamburgers beat the hot dogs at every sport they play? Because hot dogs are the wurst!
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Note : Many of our jokes have been
submitted by guests - if you find any that are offensive please let
us know and they will be removed immediately. |
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