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No animals were eaten, killed, maimed, wounded, slightly
injured, experimented on, tortured, eaten, sacrificed, frightened,
bullied, teased, humiliated, tickled, upset, ravished, tantalized,
pulled out of a hat, dishonoured or criticised during the making of this
website. Some jokes however were severely tortured in an effort to make
them funny. |
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Welcome to our archive of jokes, riddles, poems and .
. . everything!!!
Over the years we have published over 100,000 jokes,
50,000 poems, 40,000 riddles, 20,000 pictures, 10,000 funny articles
and 2 combine harvesters.
So have a look around, enjoy and get those crops cut
as soon as possible!!!
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Joke Archive : 100,000 Fabulously Amusing Jokes |
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Archive of funny love verses and other funny jokes |
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Various animal Joke
What animal do you look like when you get into the bath ? A little bear !
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Birthday Joke
For his birthday the monster asked for a heavy sweater. So they gave him a sumo wrestler!
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Men Joke
How many men does it take to open a beer? - None. It should be opened by the time she brings it.
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Kids Puns
You might be a redneck if. . . You think harass is two words. You consider fast food hitting a deer at 65 MPH. Every day someone comes to your house mistakingly thinking your having a yard sale. Fifth grade was the best six years of your life. You have more dogs than the local shelter. You consistantly receive credit card offers with a limit of $1. 25. Your postman puts rubber gloves on when the red flag is up on your mailbox. How do you know when your staying in an Arkansas hotel? When you call the front desk and say, 'I've gotta leak in my sink, ' and the person at the front desk says, 'Go ahead!'Did you hear that they have raised the minimum drinking age in West Virginia to 32? It seems they want to keep alcohol out of the high schools!Why did God invent armadillos? So that rednecks can have 'possum on the halfshell!Definition of an Arkansas Virgin: A girl who can run faster than her brothers.
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Ethnic Joke - 2
Two Polish guys were taking their first train trip to Warsaw on the train. A vendor came down the corridor selling bananas which they'd never seen before. Each bought one. The first one eagerly peeled the banana and bit into it just as the train went into a tunnel. When the train emerged from the tunnel, he looked across to his friend and said, 'I wouldn't eat that if I were you. ' 'Why not?' 'I took one bite and went blind for half a minute. '
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Vampire Joke
How does Dracula keep fit? He plays batminton.
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Joke for Kids
Mary Simpson was almost crazy with her three kids. She complained to her best friend, 'They're driving me nuts. Such pests, they give me no rest and I'm half-way to the nut hatch. ''What you need is a playpen to separate the kids from yourself, ' her friend said. So Mary bought a playpen. A few days later, her friend called to ask how things were going. 'Superb! I can't believe it, ' Mary said. 'I get in that pen with a good book and the kids don't bother me one bit!'By the way - Mary is blonde.
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Bumper Stickers - 5
If you're born again, do you have two bellybuttons?
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Note : Many of our jokes have been
submitted by guests - if you find any that are offensive please let
us know and they will be removed immediately. |
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