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No animals were eaten, killed, maimed, wounded, slightly
injured, experimented on, tortured, eaten, sacrificed, frightened,
bullied, teased, humiliated, tickled, upset, ravished, tantalized,
pulled out of a hat, dishonoured or criticised during the making of this
website. Some jokes however were severely tortured in an effort to make
them funny. |
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Welcome to our archive of jokes, riddles, poems and .
. . everything!!!
Over the years we have published over 100,000 jokes,
50,000 poems, 40,000 riddles, 20,000 pictures, 10,000 funny articles
and 2 combine harvesters.
So have a look around, enjoy and get those crops cut
as soon as possible!!!
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Joke Archive : 100,000 Fabulously Amusing Jokes |
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Archive of funny geek t shirts and other funny jokes |
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Children Joke
What's the matter son? The boy next door said I look just like you? What did you say? Nothing he's bigger than me !
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Stupid Blonde Joke
Q: What did the Dumb Blonde do when she went to a film that had an NC-17 (no under 17's) rating?
A: Went home and got 16 friends.
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Computing Joke
10. 'Honey, why is an 18-wheeler from Amazon. com backing into our driveway?'9. One Secret Service agent is sitting on your head while another is slapping cuffs on you. 8. Apparently, your flame war with DonCorleone@mafia. com is about to turn ugly. 7. When you log on, your computer says 'You've got lawsuits!'6. You're suddenly getting more Spam than the Hormel outlet store. 5. Sotheby's says the Rembrandt is yours and that you now owe them $'71
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Humorous Joke
What is the most romantic city in England? Loverpool!
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Romance Joke
One of the bachelors in the apartment development sneaked upbehind an older woman, covered her eyes with his hands, and said, 'I'mgoing to kiss you if you can't tell me who I am in three guesses. 'She quickly answered, 'George Washington! Thomas Jefferson!Abraham Lincoln!'
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Answer me this Joke
Don't you just hate the blatant materialism surrounding Christmas? And aren't you just dying to know what you got?
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Instrument Joke
Steve Wright: I play the harmonica. The only way I can play is if I get my car going really fast, and stick it out the window. I've been arrested three times for practicing.
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Car and train Joke
Ole and Lena were sitting down to their usual morning cup of coffee, listening to the weather report coming over the radio. 'There will be 3 to 5 inches of snow today, and a snow emergency has been declared, ' the weather report said. 'You must park your cars on the odd numbered side of the streets. ' Ole says 'Jeez, okay, ' and gets up from his coffee. The next day they're sitting down with their morning cups of coffee and the weather forecast declares 'There will be 2 to 4 inches of snow today, and a snow emergency has been declared. You must park your cars on the even numbered side of the streets. ' Again, Ole says 'Jeez, okay, ' and gets up from his coffee. Two days later, again they're sitting down with their cups of coffee and the weather forecast says, 'There will be 6 to 9 inches of snow today, and a snow emergency has been declared. You must park your cars on the - ' Just then the power goes out and Ole doesn't get the rest of the instructions. He turns to Lena and says 'Jeez, what am I going to do now, Lena?' Lena replies 'Aw, Ole, why don't you just leave the car in the garage today?'
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Note : Many of our jokes have been
submitted by guests - if you find any that are offensive please let
us know and they will be removed immediately. |
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