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No animals were eaten, killed, maimed, wounded, slightly
injured, experimented on, tortured, eaten, sacrificed, frightened,
bullied, teased, humiliated, tickled, upset, ravished, tantalized,
pulled out of a hat, dishonoured or criticised during the making of this
website. Some jokes however were severely tortured in an effort to make
them funny. |
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Welcome to our archive of jokes, riddles, poems and .
. . everything!!!
Over the years we have published over 100,000 jokes,
50,000 poems, 40,000 riddles, 20,000 pictures, 10,000 funny articles
and 2 combine harvesters.
So have a look around, enjoy and get those crops cut
as soon as possible!!!
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Joke Archive : 100,000 Fabulously Amusing Jokes |
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Archive of funny games movie and other funny jokes |
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Computer Joke
Doctor, doctor, I keep thinking I'm a computer. My goodness, you'd better come to my surgery right away! I can't, my power cable won't reach that far.
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Answer me this Joke
Do fish get thirsty?
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Poker and Gambling Joke
Two bored dealers are waiting around for someone to walk up and try their luck at the craps table. A very attractive lady comes in and wants to bet twenty-thousand dollars on a single roll of the dice. The dealers agree.
She says, 'I hope you don't mind, but I feel much luckier when I'm half naked. ' With that she strips naked from the waist down, and rolls the dice while yelling, 'Momma needs a new pair of pants!' She then begins jumping up and down and hugging each of the dealers.
'YES! I WIN! I WIN!' With that she picks up her money and clothes and quickly leaves.
The dealers just stare at each other dumbfounded. Finally one of them asks, 'What did she roll anyway?' The other answers, 'I don't know. I thought YOU were watching the dice!'
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Dumb Joke
A physician claims these are actual comments from his patients made while he was performing colonoscopies: 1. 'Take it easy, Doc, you're boldly going where no man has gone before. ' 2. 'Find Amelia Earhart yet?' 3. 'Can you hear me NOW?' 4. 'Are we there yet? Are we there yet? Are we there yet?' 5. 'You know, in Arkansas, we're now legally married. ' 6. 'Any sign of the trapped miners, Chief?' 7. 'You put your left hand in, you take your left hand out. You do the Hokey Pokey. . . . ' 8. 'Hey! Now I know how a Muppet feels!' 9. 'If your hand doesn't fit, you must acquit!' 10. 'Hey, Doc, let me know if you find my dignity. ' 11. 'Could you write me a note for my wife, saying that my head is not, in fact, up there?'
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Animal Joke
Two rabbits were being chased by a pack of wolves. The wolves chased the rabbits into a thicket. After a few minutes, one rabbit turned to the other and said, 'Well, do you want to make a run for it or stay here a few days and outnumber them?'
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Joke for Holidays
Q: What did the blonde customer say to the buxom waitress(reading her name tag)?A: ''Debbie'. . . that's cute. What did you name the other one?'
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Joke for Kids
Q: Why is it good to have a blonde passenger?A: You can park in the handicap zone.
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Aardvark Joke
Who's the aardvark's favorite female vocalist? Bearbara Streis-ant!
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Note : Many of our jokes have been
submitted by guests - if you find any that are offensive please let
us know and they will be removed immediately. |
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