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No animals were eaten, killed, maimed, wounded, slightly
injured, experimented on, tortured, eaten, sacrificed, frightened,
bullied, teased, humiliated, tickled, upset, ravished, tantalized,
pulled out of a hat, dishonoured or criticised during the making of this
website. Some jokes however were severely tortured in an effort to make
them funny. |
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Welcome to our archive of jokes, riddles, poems and .
. . everything!!!
Over the years we have published over 100,000 jokes,
50,000 poems, 40,000 riddles, 20,000 pictures, 10,000 funny articles
and 2 combine harvesters.
So have a look around, enjoy and get those crops cut
as soon as possible!!!
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Joke Archive : 100,000 Fabulously Amusing Jokes |
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Archive of funny gals barnsley and other funny jokes |
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Knock Knock Joke - 2
Knock Knock Who's there ! Bond ! Bond who ? Bond to succeed !
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Bumper Stickers - 6
Sorry, I don't date outside my species.
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Bumper Stickers - 5
Jack Kevorkian for White House Physician
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Mad Joke
A business man got on an elevator in a building. When he entered theelevator, there was a blonde already inside and she greeted him by saying, 'T-G-I-F'? (letters only). He smiled at her and replied, 'S-H-I-T' (letters only). 'She looked at him, puzzled, and said, 'T-G-I-F' again. He acknowledged her remark again by answering, 'S-H-I-T. 'The blond was trying to be friendly, so she smiled her biggest smile andsaid as sweetly as possibly 'T-G-I-F' another time. The man smiled 'S-H-I-T. 'The blond finally decided to explain things, and this time she said, 'T-G-I-F, Thank Goodness It's Friday, get it?'The man answered, 'Sorry, Honey, It's Thursday. '
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Funny Famous Joke
A man lay spread out over three seats in the second row of a movie theater. As he lay there breathing heavily, an usher came over and said, 'That's very rude of you, sir, taking up three seats. Didn't you learn any manners! Where did you come from?'The man looked up helplessly and said, 'The balcony!'
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Bumper Stickers - 3
God gave man a brain and a penis and only enough blood to operate one at a time.
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American Joke
Little old lady at US immigration.
OFFICIAL: Do you advocate the overthrow of the government by violence or subversion?
(Pause for thought)
LITTLE OLD LADY: Violence, I think.
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Animal World
A little turtle begins to climb a tree slowly. After long hours of effort, he reaches the top, jumps into the air waving his front legs, until reaches heavily into the ground with a hard knock over his shell. After recovering his consciousness, he starts to climb the tree again, jumps again, and knocks the ground heavily again. The little turtle insisted again and again after each knock, while a couple of birds sitting at the edge of a branch, looking the turtle with pain. . suddenly the female bird says to the male: 'Hey dear, I think it's time to tell our little turtle he is adopted. '
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Note : Many of our jokes have been
submitted by guests - if you find any that are offensive please let
us know and they will be removed immediately. |
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