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No animals were eaten, killed, maimed, wounded, slightly
injured, experimented on, tortured, eaten, sacrificed, frightened,
bullied, teased, humiliated, tickled, upset, ravished, tantalized,
pulled out of a hat, dishonoured or criticised during the making of this
website. Some jokes however were severely tortured in an effort to make
them funny. |
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Welcome to our archive of jokes, riddles, poems and .
. . everything!!!
Over the years we have published over 100,000 jokes,
50,000 poems, 40,000 riddles, 20,000 pictures, 10,000 funny articles
and 2 combine harvesters.
So have a look around, enjoy and get those crops cut
as soon as possible!!!
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Joke Archive : 100,000 Fabulously Amusing Jokes |
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Archive of funny friendship text messages and other funny jokes |
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Religion Joke
The girl knelt in the confessional and said, 'Bless me, Father, for I have sinned. ''What is it, child?''Father, I have committed the sin of vanity. Twice a day I gaze at myself in the mirrorand tell myself how beautiful I am. 'The priest turned, took a good look at the girl, and said, 'My dear, I have good news. That isn'ta sin. . . it's simply a mistake. '
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Money Joke
How did the man feel when he got a big bill from the electric company? He was shocked.
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Funny Kids Joke
What do you get if you cross a cement mixer, a ghoul and a chicken?
A demon cement mixer.
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Computer Joke
Why did the school bully kick the classroom computer? Someone told him he was supposed to boot up the system.
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Free Adult Joke
A guy walks into a bar with a dog under his arm, puts the dog on the bar and announces that the dog can talk and that he has $100 he's willing to bet anyone who says he can't. The bartender quickly takes the bet and the owner looks at the dog and asks, 'What's the thing on top of this building which keeps the rain from coming inside?' The dog answers 'ROOF. ' The bartender says, 'Who are you kidding? I'm not paying. 'The dogs owner says, 'How about double or nothing and I'll ask him something else. 'The bartender agrees and the owner turns to the dog and asks, 'Who was the greatest ballplayer of all time?' The dog answers with a muffled 'RUTH. 'With that the bartender picks them both up and throws them out the door. As they bounce on the sidewalk, the dog looks at his owner and says, 'DiMaggio?'
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Business Joke
A businessman who needed millions of dollars to clinch an important deal went to church to pray for the money. By chance he knelt next to a man who was praying for $100 to pay an urgent debt. The businessman took out his wallet and pressed $100 into the other man's hand. Overjoyed, the man got up and left the church. The businessman then closed his eyes and prayed, 'And now, Lord, that I have your undivided attention . . . . '
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Cat Joke
If a cat won an Oscar, what would he get? An a-cat-emy award.
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Knock Knock Joke - 3
Knock Knock Who's there ! Chloe ! Chloe who ? Chloe's Encounters of the Third Kind !
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Note : Many of our jokes have been
submitted by guests - if you find any that are offensive please let
us know and they will be removed immediately. |
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