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No animals were eaten, killed, maimed, wounded, slightly
injured, experimented on, tortured, eaten, sacrificed, frightened,
bullied, teased, humiliated, tickled, upset, ravished, tantalized,
pulled out of a hat, dishonoured or criticised during the making of this
website. Some jokes however were severely tortured in an effort to make
them funny. |
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Welcome to our archive of jokes, riddles, poems and .
. . everything!!!
Over the years we have published over 100,000 jokes,
50,000 poems, 40,000 riddles, 20,000 pictures, 10,000 funny articles
and 2 combine harvesters.
So have a look around, enjoy and get those crops cut
as soon as possible!!!
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Joke Archive : 100,000 Fabulously Amusing Jokes |
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Archive of funny cats and dogs videos and other funny jokes |
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Office Humor
Did you know diarrhoea is hereditary?Yup. . . it runs in your genes!
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Situation Joke
These two country boys, brothers, were knocking around one lazy summer day and thought it would be a good prank to push over the outhouse. They crept up from an advantageous direction like a couple of commandos, pushed the outhouse over on one side and headed for the woods. They circled round and returned home an hour later from a completely different direction thus, trying to divert suspicion from themselves. Upon returning, their father approached them with switch in hand and bellowed, 'Did you two push the outhouse over this afternoon?'The older boy replied, 'As learned in school, I cannot tell a lie. Yes, Father, we pushed over the outhouse this afternoon. 'At this revalation, the farmer proceeded to flail the two boys severely and sent them to bed without supper. In the morning, the two boys meekly approached the brekfast table and took their seats. Everything was quiet until their father finally said, 'Have you two learned your lesson?''Sure, Dad!' said the big brother, 'But, in school we learned that George Washington admitted to HIS father that he'd chopped down a cherry tree and he was forgiven because he told the truth. ''Ah yes!' said the farmer, 'BUT, George's DAD, wasn't in the cherry tree when he chopped it down!!!'
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Elderly People Joke
What's the worst thing about having to kiss Grandma?When the damn coffin lid falls and hits you in the head.
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Funny Joke Online
There was once a wife so jealous that when her husband came home one night and she couldn't find hairs on his jackets she yelled at him, 'Great, so now you're cheating on me with a bald woman!'
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Sport Joke
The Top 9 Signs Your City Used Bribes to Become an Olympic Site9. IOC members seem unconcerned over scheduling conflicts due to the yachting, diving and swimming events all being held in the 34th Street YMCA pool. 8. All 75 of the new hires in the mayor's office are named either Ingrid or Sven. 7. After Philadelphia lands the Summer Games, Juan Antonio Samaranch sports a hood ornament that looks strangely like the Liberty Bell. 6. Only someone bribed with hookers and college tuition wouldn't think the term 'New York City Hospitality Committee' is an oxymoron. 5. Karl Malone is now playing forward for the Utah Samaranches. 4. T-shirt for sale in the hotel lobby: 'My dad went to Salt Lake City, and all I got was this T-shirt and college tuition. ' 3. 'Miss Salt Lake' for 1999 requires a translator to deliver her coronation speech. 2. New Olympic mascots: Vinny and Knuckles. and the Number 1 Sign Your City Used Bribes to Become an Olympic Site. . . 1. The IOC suddenly decides to change the official cycling uniforms to white shirts and ties. This list is copyrighted by Chris White.
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Blonde Joke - 2
Q: How many blonde jokes are there? A: One - the rest are all true.
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Men Joke
Men are like lava lamps. Fun to look at, but not very bright.
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Funniest Joke
Adam: 'You are what you eat. ' Eve: 'At least he doesn't compare me to his mother. ' Abraham: 'I'm goin' not knowin'. ' Noah: 'Honk if you believe in treading water. ' Moses: 'From a basket case to the promise land. ' Elizah: 'When Jezebel ain't happy, ain't nobody happy. ' Balaam: 'My second donkey talks!' Prodigal Son: 'All roads lead to home. ' At the Sinai desert: 'Winding road next 40 years' At the Red Sea: 'Caution! Subject to sudden flooding'
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Note : Many of our jokes have been
submitted by guests - if you find any that are offensive please let
us know and they will be removed immediately. |
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