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bullied, teased, humiliated, tickled, upset, ravished, tantalized,
pulled out of a hat, dishonoured or criticised during the making of this
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Welcome to our archive of jokes, riddles, poems and .
. . everything!!!
Over the years we have published over 100,000 jokes,
50,000 poems, 40,000 riddles, 20,000 pictures, 10,000 funny articles
and 2 combine harvesters.
So have a look around, enjoy and get those crops cut
as soon as possible!!!
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Joke Archive : 100,000 Fabulously Amusing Jokes |
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Archive of funny cartoon drawings and other funny jokes |
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Situation Joke
The barber was finishing a haircut on a customer one dayand started to apply some 'Aftershave Lotion' around hisears when the customer yelled, 'Don't put that crap on me!My wife says it smells like a French Whorehouse!'Another customer who was waiting replied, 'Hey John, youcan put the 'Aftershave Lotion' on me. . . My wife has neverbeen in a French Whorehouse!' Then the fun began. . .
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Kids Puns
Real estate man: Would you like to see a model home?Man: I sure would, when does she get off work?
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Computer Joke
Dear Boss, I hope I haven't misunderstood your instructions. Because to be honest, boss, none of this Y to K dates problem makes any sense to me. At any rate I have finished converting all the months on all the company calendars so that the year 2000 is ready to go with the following improved months: Januark, Februark, Mak, Julk. In addition, I have changed the days of the week, and they are now: Sundak, Mondak, Tuesdak, Wednesdak, Thursdak, Fridak and Saturdak. Is it enough, or should I change any other Y to K? I am a fan of the New York Yankees. Should I call them New Kork Kankees in order to be Y2K ready?
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Gorilla Joke
Why did the Ape jump off the building? He wanted to show the world the stuff he was made of!
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Funny College Joke
WOMEN'S RIGHTSThe following took place at an international conference for women's rights. The first speaker, a lady from England stood and said, 'During last year's conference, we spoke about being more assertive with our husbands. Well, after the conference, I went home and told my husband, Barrington, that I would no longer cook for him and that he would have to do it himself. After the first day, I saw nothing. The second day, I saw nothing, but on the third day, I saw that he had cooked a wonderful roast lamb. ' (The crowd cheered). The second speaker from Russia, stood up and said, 'After last year's conference, I went home and told my husband, Ivan, that I would no longer do his laundry and that he would have to do it himself. The first day, I saw nothing. After the second day, I saw nothing, but on the third day, I saw that he had done not only his own washing, but mine as well. (The crowd again cheered). The third speaker, a Jamaican lady, stood up and said, ' After lass year's conference, I wen home and tole dat lazy husband of mines, Dingo Jack, dat I was froo pickin up his beer cans, cookin his tucker and washing his undaweah and dat he was goin to haf to do dem himself. (The crowd went wild with cheering and clapping that lasted for five long minutes). She continued. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 'Afta da first day, I nevah see nuffing. Afta da second day I nevah see nuffing, >Keep Scrolling > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >but afta da fird day, I could see a little bit out of my leff eye. '
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Heaven and hell Joke
Three buddies die in a car crash, and they go to heaven to an orientation. They are all asked, 'When you are in your casket and friends and family are mourning upon you, what would you like to hear them say about you? The first guy says, 'I would like to hear them say that I was a great doctor of my time, and a great family man. ' The second guy says, 'I would like to hear that I was a wonderful husband and school teacher which made a huge difference in our children of tomorrow. ' The last guy replies, 'I would like to hear them say, 'Look! He's moving!'
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Car and train Joke
What is the difference between a locomotive engineer and a teacher? One minds the train, the other trains the mind.
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Witch Joke
What happens if you see twin witches? You won't be able to tell witch witch is witch.
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Note : Many of our jokes have been
submitted by guests - if you find any that are offensive please let
us know and they will be removed immediately. |
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