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No animals were eaten, killed, maimed, wounded, slightly
injured, experimented on, tortured, eaten, sacrificed, frightened,
bullied, teased, humiliated, tickled, upset, ravished, tantalized,
pulled out of a hat, dishonoured or criticised during the making of this
website. Some jokes however were severely tortured in an effort to make
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Welcome to our archive of jokes, riddles, poems and .
. . everything!!!
Over the years we have published over 100,000 jokes,
50,000 poems, 40,000 riddles, 20,000 pictures, 10,000 funny articles
and 2 combine harvesters.
So have a look around, enjoy and get those crops cut
as soon as possible!!!
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Joke Archive : 100,000 Fabulously Amusing Jokes |
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Archive of funny bra and other funny jokes |
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Bumper Stickers - 2
CAUTION! I drive like you do!
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Burger Joke
What did they call it when NHL officials refused to allow a hamburger to play hockey in the league? Rink injustice!
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Strange Humor
As a couple sat in the living room, watching TV, the phone rang. The husband picked it up, listened for a moment and then screamed, 'Damn it! How should I know? Call the weather bureau!' and hung up. 'What was that all about?' wife asked. 'Awww, some idiot wanted to know whether the coast was clear!'
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Relationships Joke
A somewhat drunk man feels a bald man's head and says, 'Say, your head feels just like my wife's ass. 'The bald man feels his own head and says with a grin, 'You know, you're right!'
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Funny Men Joke
Did you ever stop to wonder what would happen if your dog's name was Mypenis?- Mypenis ate my homework. - Oh, no! Mypenis is frothing at the mouth!- Sorry I'm late. I was playing with Mypenis. - I'm sorry, Officer. I didn't realize I had to keep Mypenis on a leash. - Mypenis doesn't come when I call it. - Mypenis likes to crawl between the legs of guests. - I love giving Mypenis a bath. - At night, I sleep with Mypenis in my hands. - Mypenis likes it when people pet him. - Mypenis needs to get more exercise. He weighs over fifty pounds. - Playing with Mypenis really wears me out. - Would you like to see a picture of Mypenis?- Sometimes I wake up, and Mypenis is already active. - I think Mypenis has a mind of its own. - I keep a picture of Mypenis in my wallet. - Whenever I get lost, Mypenis points me in the right direction. - I think Mypenis is getting old because he won't get excited anymore. He just plays dead. - Mypenis got out last night. I think he's sleeping with the lady next door. - If Mypenis was a weiner dog, he would be long and hairy and hard to carry. - Mypenis loves to chase pussies in dark alleys. - Help! I can't find Mypenis!- Sorry to be driving so slow, officer, but I was looking forMypenis. - Mypenis gets excited whenever the mailman comes. - Sorry to be driving so fast, officer - I have to take Mypenis to the hospital. - Oh. no! Something bit Mypenis!- Watch it or you'll step on Mypenis. - When Mypenis behaves well, he gets a bone. - Stop kicking Mypenis. - When riding in the car, Mypenis enjoys sticking his head out to be blown. - Mypenis is truly man's best friend. - Beware of Mypenis. He's carrying a disease. - People say Mypenis looks cute lying down, but even better when standing at attention. - Mypenis: the crotch-sniffer. - There's nothing like a well-trained bitch for Mypenis. - I've trained Mypenis to jump through hoops. - Mypenis always searches for an open hand under the dinner table. - Excuse me - I need a muzzle for Mypenis. - Sorry I'm late, but Mypenis kept me up howling all night. . .
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Aviation Joke
Part of a Flight Attendant's arrival announcement: 'We'd like to thank you folks for flying with us today. And, the next time you get the insane urge to go blasting through the skies in a pressurized metal tube, we hope you'll think of us here at US Airways. '
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Humorous Joke
As Jack the Ripper's mother said to her son, 'How come you never go out with the same girl twice?'As Caesar said, 'Let me mix that salad!'As Moses said to God, 'Let me see if I have it right - the Arabs get the oil and we get to cut off the tips of our WHAT?'As George Washington said when he was crossing the Delaware, 'I can't understand it. I paid for a seat!'As Jesse James said to his brother Frank, 'We can't rob that bank. That's where we keep our money!'As Vincent Van Gogh said after he cut off his ear, 'Don't shout!'
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Medical Joke
Name something a duck can do, that a doctor won't. Stick his bill up his ass.
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Note : Many of our jokes have been
submitted by guests - if you find any that are offensive please let
us know and they will be removed immediately. |
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