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pulled out of a hat, dishonoured or criticised during the making of this
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Welcome to our archive of jokes, riddles, poems and .
. . everything!!!
Over the years we have published over 100,000 jokes,
50,000 poems, 40,000 riddles, 20,000 pictures, 10,000 funny articles
and 2 combine harvesters.
So have a look around, enjoy and get those crops cut
as soon as possible!!!
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Joke Archive : 100,000 Fabulously Amusing Jokes |
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Archive of funny bookmarks and other funny jokes |
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Bar Joke - 2
A regular at Bob's Bar came in one evening sporting a matched pair of swollen black eyes that appeared extremely painful. 'Whoa, Sam!' said the bartender. 'Who gave those beauties to you?''Nobody gave them to me, ' said Sam. 'I had to fight like crazy for both of them. '
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Knock Knock Joke - 2
Knock Knock Who's there ! Begonia ! Begonia who ? Begonia bother me !
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Law Enforcement Joke
Two priests were riding very fast on a motorcycle. They were promptly stopped by
a policeman who said, “What do you think you are doing? What if you have an accident?”
The priests say, “Don't worry, my son. Jesus is with us. ”
The policeman says, “In that case, I have to book you. Three people are not allowed to
ride on a motorcycle. ”
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Funny School Kids Joke
What's gray, squeaky and hangs around in caves?Stalagmice!
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Funny College Joke
All those who believe in psychokinesis raise my hand. Early bird gets the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese Quantum Mechanics: The dreams stuff is made of I almost had a psychic girlfriend but she left me before we met OK, so what's the speed of dark? How do you tell when you run out of invisible ink? If everything seems to be going well, you have obviously overlooked something. Support bacteria - they're the only culture some people have Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm When everything's coming your way, you're in the wrong lane. Ambition is a poor excuse for not having enough sense to be lazy. Hard work pays off in the future. Laziness pays off now. The only substitute for good manners is fast reflexes. Everyone has a photographic memory. Some don't have film. Shin: a device for finding furniture in the dark. Many people quit looking for work when they find a job. I intend to live forever - so far, so good Join the Army, meet interesting people, kill them. Energizer Bunny arrested, charged with battery. If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends? Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines I'm not cheap, but I am on special this week I drive way too fast to worry about cholesterol I love defenseless animals, especially in a good gravy If you ain't makin' waves, you ain't kickin' hard enough! Mental backup in progress - Do Not Disturb! Mind Like A Steel Trap - Rusty And Illegal In 37 States Televangelists: The Pro Wrestlers of religion. Give a man a free hand and he'll run it all over you. If I worked as much as others, I would do as little as they. Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder . . . 24 hours in a day . . . 24 beers in a case . . . coincidence? Dancing is a perpendicular expression of a horizontal desire. When I'm not in my right mind, my left mind gets pretty crowded.
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Heaven and hell Joke
A man dies and goes to Heaven. He gets to meet GOD and asks GOD if he can ask him a few questions. 'Sure, ' GOD says, 'Go right ahead'. 'OK, ' the man says. 'Why did you make women so pretty?' GOD says, 'So you would like them. ' 'OK, ' the guy says. 'But how come you made them so beautiful?' 'So you would LOVE them', GOD replies. The man ponders a moment and then asks, 'But why did you make them such airheads?' GOD says, 'So they would love you!'
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Naughty Joke
How do you get Visual Aids? - From a nasty poke in the eye.
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Bird Joke
Teacher: Why do we put a hyphen in a bird-cage? Pupil: For a parrot to perch on, miss.
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Note : Many of our jokes have been
submitted by guests - if you find any that are offensive please let
us know and they will be removed immediately. |
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