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No animals were eaten, killed, maimed, wounded, slightly injured, experimented on, tortured, eaten, sacrificed, frightened, bullied, teased, humiliated, tickled, upset, ravished, tantalized, pulled out of a hat, dishonoured or criticised during the making of this website. Some jokes however were severely tortured in an effort to make them funny.

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Welcome to our archive of jokes, riddles, poems and . . . everything!!!

Over the years we have published over 100,000 jokes, 50,000 poems, 40,000 riddles, 20,000 pictures, 10,000 funny articles and 2 combine harvesters.

So have a look around, enjoy and get those crops cut as soon as possible!!!

 
Joke Archive : 100,000 Fabulously Amusing Jokes

 

Archive of funny birthday ideas and other funny jokes

Mother Joke

'Be good and for your birthday I'll buy you a motorcycle!'

'How on earth can you see the TV sitting so far back?'

'Don't bother wearing a jacket--it's quite warm out. '

'Let me smell that shirt--yeah, it's good for another week. '

'I think a cluttered bedroom is a sign of creativity. '

'Yeah, I used to skip school, too. '

'Just leave all the lights on. . . it makes the house more cheery. '

'Could you turn the music up louder so I can enjoy it, too?'

'Run and bring me the scissors! Hurry!'

'Aw, just turn these undies inside out. No one will ever know. '

'I don't have a tissue with me--just use your sleeve. '

'Well, if Timmy's Mom says it's okay, that's good enough for me. '

'Of course you should walk to school and back. What's the big deal about having to cross a few main streets?'

'My meeting won't be over till later tonight. You kids don't mind if we skip dinner?


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Computer Joke

Tech Support: 'What does the screen say now. ' Person: 'It says, 'Hit ENTER when ready'. ' Tech Support: 'Well?' Person: 'How do I know when it's ready?'


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Book title Joke

Fade Away by Peter Out


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Criminal Joke

What diploma do criminals get? The third degree.


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Burger Joke

How does a pitcher walk a man in Burger Land baseball? He throws four meatballs!


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Naughty Joke

The morning after their honeymoon night, Julie says to herhusband, 'you know, You're really a lousy lover!'Her husband replies, 'How would you know after only 30 seconds?'


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Bumper Stickers - 3

How come we choose from just two people to run for president and 50 for Miss America?


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Funny Famous Joke

A man and a woman were waiting at the hospital donation center. Man: 'What are you doing here today?'Woman: 'Oh, I'm here to donate some blood. They're going to give me $5 for it. 'Man: 'Hmm, that's interesting. I'm here to donate sperm, myself. But they pay me $25. 'The woman looked thoughtful for a moment and they chatted some more before going their separate ways. Several months later, the same man and woman meet again in the donation center. Man: 'Oh, hi there! Here to donate blood again?'Woman: [shaking her head with mouth closed] 'Unh unh. '



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