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No animals were eaten, killed, maimed, wounded, slightly
injured, experimented on, tortured, eaten, sacrificed, frightened,
bullied, teased, humiliated, tickled, upset, ravished, tantalized,
pulled out of a hat, dishonoured or criticised during the making of this
website. Some jokes however were severely tortured in an effort to make
them funny. |
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Welcome to our archive of jokes, riddles, poems and .
. . everything!!!
Over the years we have published over 100,000 jokes,
50,000 poems, 40,000 riddles, 20,000 pictures, 10,000 funny articles
and 2 combine harvesters.
So have a look around, enjoy and get those crops cut
as soon as possible!!!
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Joke Archive : 100,000 Fabulously Amusing Jokes |
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Archive of funny beach marbella and other funny jokes |
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Funny Famous Joke
A woman goes to the doctor's and says, 'Doctor, Doctor, you have to help me. Every time I go to the bathroom, DIMES come out!'The doctor tells her to relax, go home, rest with her feet up and come back in a week. A week later the woman returns and says, 'Doctor, Doctor, it's gotten worse! Every time I go to the bathroom, QUARTERS come out!! What's wrong with me?'Again the doctor tells her to relax, go home, rest with her feet up and come back in a week. Another week passes and the woman returns and yells, 'Doctor, Doctor, I'm still not getting better! Every time I go to the bathroom, HALF-DOLLARS come out! WHAT THE HECK IS WRONG WITH ME?!!'The doctor says, 'Relax, Relax, . . . you're just going through your change!'
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Stupid Men
Why don't men make ice cubes?
They can't find the recipe.
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Law and Lawyer Joke
How do you get a lawyer out of a tree? Cut the rope.
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Knock Knock Joke - 2
Knock Knock Who's there ! Almond ! Almond who ? Almond the side of the law ! Kn
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Weather Joke
The Indians asked their Chief in autumn, if the winter was going to be cold or not. Not really knowing an answer, the chief replies that the winter was going to be cold and that the members of the village were to collect wood to be prepared. Being a good leader, he then went to the next phone booth and called the National Weather Service and asked, 'Is this winter to be cold?' The man on the phone responded, 'This winter was going to be quite cold indeed. ' So the Chief went back to speed up his people to collect even more wood to be prepared. A week later he called the National Weather Service again, 'Is it going to be a VERY cold winter?' 'Yes', the man replied, 'it's going to be a very cold winter. ' So the Chief goes back to his people and orders them to go and find every scrap of wood they can find. Two weeks later he calls the National Weather Service again: 'Are you absol utely sure, that the winter is going to be very cold?' 'Absolutely' the man replies, 'the Indians are collecting wood like crazy!'
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Computer Joke
Microsoft is reportedly buying a multibillion dollar stake in AT&T… Americans can now look forward to rebooting their telephones.
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Yo momma Joke
Yo Mama's so fat she uses an air balloon for parachute.
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Politics Humor
Now that Uday & Qusay have been eliminated, a lot of the lesser-knownHussein family members are coming to the attention of Americanauthorities. Among the brothers:------------------Sooflay . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . the restauranteurGuday. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . the half-Australian brotherHuray. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . the sports fanaticBejay. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . the gay brotherKuntay & Kintay. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . the twins from the African motherSayhay. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . the baseball playerOjay. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . the stalker / murdererGulay. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . the singer / entertainerEbay. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . the internet czarBiliray. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . the country music starEcksray. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . the radiologistPuray. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . the blender factory ownerTupay. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . the one with bad hairAmong the sisters:-----------------Pusay. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . the 'loose' 22 yr oldLattay. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . the coffee shop ownerBufay. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . the 300 pound sisterDushay. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . the clean sisterPhayray. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . the zoo worker in the gorilla houseSapheway. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . the grocery store owner:Ollay. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . the half-mexican sisterGudlay. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . the prostituteMore will, no doubt, be discovered. . . including A. A. Sidday, Oz weekend TV Host.
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Note : Many of our jokes have been
submitted by guests - if you find any that are offensive please let
us know and they will be removed immediately. |
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