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5QS |
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No animals were eaten, killed, maimed, wounded, slightly
injured, experimented on, tortured, eaten, sacrificed, frightened,
bullied, teased, humiliated, tickled, upset, ravished, tantalized,
pulled out of a hat, dishonoured or criticised during the making of this
website. Some jokes however were severely tortured in an effort to make
them funny. |
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Welcome to our archive of jokes, riddles, poems and .
. . everything!!!
Over the years we have published over 100,000 jokes,
50,000 poems, 40,000 riddles, 20,000 pictures, 10,000 funny articles
and 2 combine harvesters.
So have a look around, enjoy and get those crops cut
as soon as possible!!!
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Joke Archive : 100,000 Fabulously Amusing Jokes |
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Archive of funny animated screensavers and other funny jokes |
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Children Joke
Little Joey and Little Danny, both aged '5
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Priceless Joke
Q: What did the black baby say to its mother when it had diarrhea? A: 'Mommy, I'm melting!!!'
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Internet Joke
Can you show me how to use the Internet? I'd better - otherwise you'll just go round and round in circles.
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Bar Joke - 1
A man in a bar sees a friend at a table, drinking by himself. Approaching the friend he comments, 'You look terrible. What's the problem?' 'My mother died in August, ' he said, 'and left me $'25
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Bar Joke , beer, booze and fun!
A Russian walks into a bar and orders a beer. 'That will be one ruble, ' says the bartender. 'One ruble!' the customer protests, 'last week it was only fifty kopeks!' 'Well, ' replies the bartender, 'it's fifty kopeks for the beer and fifty kopecs for the perestroika. ' Reluctantly, the customer gives the bartender a ruble, and is surprised when the bartender gives him back fifty kopecs and says, 'We are out of beer. '
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Car and train Joke
After spending 3-1/2 hours enduring the long lines, surly clerks, and insane regulations at the department of motor vehicles, I stopped at a toy store to pick up a gift for my son. I brought my selection - a baseball bat - to the cash register. 'Cash or charge?' the clerk asked. 'Cash, ' I snapped. Then, apologizing for my rudeness, I explained, 'I've spent the afternoon at the motor-vehicle bureau. ' 'Shall I giftwrap the bat?' the clerk asked sweetly. 'Or are you going back there?'
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Funny Joke Online
You know you're Castle Trash if. . . . . . Your shroud of Turin is painted on velvetYour daughter's chastity belt has rustedYou can't afford a cod piece. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . nobody noticesYou have more sheep dogs than sheepYou sold your only horse to buy that jousting lance you just had to have. . . The plague improved your complexion. . . . . . . . . . . but only for a little whileThe Pope sends you to the Crusades. . . . . . . . . . . in NorwayYour armor is made from that foil that came with your chewing gumYour wife is stronger than your plow horse. . . but the horse is prettierThe grail you brought home has 'made in China' printed on the bottomYour wife says you have the smallest turret in the kingdomYou won 'most improved ' at the tournamentThey call your daughter made MarianYour family crest is a chicken with a banner that says 'peace before discomfort'Your sheep seem strangely nervous around your oldest son
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Blonde Joke - 1
A car was driving down the street when all of a sudden it started swerving. The car was going back and forth till someone with a cell phone called the police. A police officer pulled the car over. A blonde rolls down the window and says, ' Officer, I'm so glad you are here. I saw a tree in the road, then I saw another. So I had to swerve to keep from hitting it!' The officer looks at her, then says, 'Ma'am, That's your air freshener. '
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Note : Many of our jokes have been
submitted by guests - if you find any that are offensive please let
us know and they will be removed immediately. |
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