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No animals were eaten, killed, maimed, wounded, slightly
injured, experimented on, tortured, eaten, sacrificed, frightened,
bullied, teased, humiliated, tickled, upset, ravished, tantalized,
pulled out of a hat, dishonoured or criticised during the making of this
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Welcome to our archive of jokes, riddles, poems and .
. . everything!!!
Over the years we have published over 100,000 jokes,
50,000 poems, 40,000 riddles, 20,000 pictures, 10,000 funny articles
and 2 combine harvesters.
So have a look around, enjoy and get those crops cut
as soon as possible!!!
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Joke Archive : 100,000 Fabulously Amusing Jokes |
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Archive of fun world fancy dress and other funny jokes |
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Very Silly Joke
Two bananas are lying on a river bank when a turd comes floating by. The turd looks over and says, 'Hey! Come on in! The water's fine!' One banana turns to the other banana and says, 'Do you believe that shit?'
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Bumper Stickers - 1
Body By Nautilus; Brain By Mattel
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Funny Joke - 50 best Joke
A Texan walks into a pub in Ireland and clears his voice to the crowd of drinkers. He says, 'I hear you Irish are a bunch of hard drinkers. I'll give $500 American dollars to anybody in here who can drink 10 pints of Guinness back-to-back. ' The room is quiet and no one takes up the Texan's offer. One man even leaves. Thirty minutes later the same gentleman who left shows back up and taps the Texan on the shoulder. 'Is your bet still good?', asks the Irishman. The Texan says yes and asks the bartender to line up 10 pints of Guinness. Immediately the Irishman tears into all 10 of the pint glasses drinking them all back-to-back. The other pub patrons cheer as the Texan sits in amazement. The Texan gives the Irishman the $500 and says, 'If ya don't mind me askin
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Blind Joke
A blind man was describing his favorite sport, parachuting. When asked how this was accomplished, he said that things were all done for him: 'I am placed in the door with my seeing eye dog and told when to jump. My hand is placed on my release ring for me and out I go with the dog. ' 'But how do you know when you are going to land?' he was asked. 'I have a very keen sense of smell, and I can smell the trees and grass when I am 300 feet from the ground' he answered. 'But how do you know when to lift your legs for the final arrival on the ground?' he was again asked. He quickly answered: 'Oh, the dog's leash goes slack. '
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Sports Humor
At a college with a shady reputation, the new dean responded to investigations into the basketball team by suspending any basketball player who wasn't maintaining a passing average. Furious, the coach came storming into the dean's office, followed by one of his star players. 'You can't keep him from playing!' the coach roared. 'We won't win this weekend without him!''I don't care, ' the dean said. 'Things have gotten out of hand at this college. ''What do you mean, out of hand?' the coach demanded. 'I'll show you what I mean, ' the dean said. He turned to the basketball player and said, 'Tell me, how much is six times seven?'The player thought for several seconds. Then he said, 'Thirty- one?'The dean turned to the coach and said, 'I rest my case. ''Oh, come on now, ' the coach said. 'Why are you making such a big deal of it? After all, he only missed it by one. '
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Bumper Stickers - 4
If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the terminal?
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Yo Mama Joke
Yo mama so stupid she tripped over a cordless phone.
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Men Joke
If men had PMS, what would happen?a) The federal government would allocate funds to study it. b) Cramps would become an acceptable reason to apply for permanent disability. c) There would be a federal holiday every 28 days. d) All of the above.
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Note : Many of our jokes have been
submitted by guests - if you find any that are offensive please let
us know and they will be removed immediately. |
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