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No animals were eaten, killed, maimed, wounded, slightly
injured, experimented on, tortured, eaten, sacrificed, frightened,
bullied, teased, humiliated, tickled, upset, ravished, tantalized,
pulled out of a hat, dishonoured or criticised during the making of this
website. Some jokes however were severely tortured in an effort to make
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Welcome to our archive of jokes, riddles, poems and .
. . everything!!!
Over the years we have published over 100,000 jokes,
50,000 poems, 40,000 riddles, 20,000 pictures, 10,000 funny articles
and 2 combine harvesters.
So have a look around, enjoy and get those crops cut
as soon as possible!!!
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Joke Archive : 100,000 Fabulously Amusing Jokes |
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Archive of fun wedding favors and other funny jokes |
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Cow Joke
Is there big money in the cattle business? So I've herd!
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Miscellaneous Joke
A lady was in a hardware store looking at a fishing poles. She asked the store manager how much it was he said 'I am blind drop it on the ground and i'll tell ya. She dropped it on the ground. 'Aahh that's 10. 00. ' She bent down and let a big fart that everyone heard. But, she really wanted the pole so she picked it up. And went to pay for it. 'That will be 20. 00' 'But you said 10. 00' '10. 00 extra for the stink bait and duck call.
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Bumper Stickers - 4
I LIKE CATS! They taste like chicken.
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Ethnical Joke
There was once a Scotsman and an Englishman who lived next door to each other. The Scotsman owned a hen and each morning would look in his garden and pick up one of his hen's eggs for breakfast. One day he looked outside and saw that the hen had laid an egg in the Englishman's garden. He was about to go next door when he saw the Englishman pick up the egg. The Scotsman ran up to the Englishman and told him that the egg belonged to him because he owned the hen. The Englishman disagreed because the egg was laid on his property. They argued for a while until finally the Scotsman said, 'In my family we normally solve disputes by the following actions: I punch you in the nose and note how long it takes you to recover, then you punch me in the nose and note how long it takes for me to recover, whomever recovers quicker wins the egg. 'The Englishman agreed to this and so the Scotsman held the heaviest object he could find, took a few steps back, then ran toward the Englishman and punched him as hard as he could in the nose. The Englishman fell to the ground and was howling in agony and holding his nose for thirty minutes. Eventually the Englishman stood up and said, 'Now it's my turn to punch you. 'The Scotsman said, 'Keep the lousy egg. '
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Mad Joke
Is that your head or is your neck blowing a bubble?
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Romance Joke
Staring down from the bench to announce the terms of thedivorce decree, the judge turned to the husband and said:'I'm going to award her alimony in the amount of $250 a month. ' To which the woman's about-to-be ex replied: 'That's mightykind of you, judge. I'll try to help her all I can, too. '
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Spoof Joke
Things You'll Never Hear A Man Say: Here honey, you use the remote. You know, I'd like to see her again, but her breasts are just too big. Ooh, Antonio Banderas AND Brad Pitt? That's one movie I gotta see! While I'm up, can I get you anything? Honey since we don't have anything else planned, will you go to the wallpaper store with me? Why don't you go to the mall with me and help me pick out a pair of shoes? Aww, forget Monday night football, Let's watch Melrose Place. Hey let me hold your purse while you try that on. We never talk anymore
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Idiot and fool Joke
After interviewing a particularly short-spoken job candidate, I described the person to my boss as rather monosyllabic. My boss said, 'Really? Where is Monosyllabia?'. Thinking that he was just kidding, I played along and said that it was just south of Elbonia. He replied, 'Oh, you mean over by Croatia?'
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Note : Many of our jokes have been
submitted by guests - if you find any that are offensive please let
us know and they will be removed immediately. |
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