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Welcome to our archive of jokes, riddles, poems and .
. . everything!!!
Over the years we have published over 100,000 jokes,
50,000 poems, 40,000 riddles, 20,000 pictures, 10,000 funny articles
and 2 combine harvesters.
So have a look around, enjoy and get those crops cut
as soon as possible!!!
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Joke Archive : 100,000 Fabulously Amusing Jokes |
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Archive of fun tropicale and other funny jokes |
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Burger Joke
What do burgers think when they are surrounded by gherkins? They think they are in a pickle.
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Animal Joke
Psychiatrist: What's your problem?Patient: I think I'm a chicken. Psychiatrist: How long has this been going on?Patient: Ever since I was an egg!
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Elderly People Joke
'Look at me. ' an elderly Yuppie boasted to his guests at his birthday bash. 'I've aged like a fine old carefully stored wine. ''I certainly have to agree with that. ' piped-up his obviously long suffering wife. 'Henry's cork's been stationary for years. '
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Law Enforcement Joke
A police officer pulls a guy over for speeding and has the following exchange:Officer: May I see your driver's license?Driver: I don't have one. I had it suspended when I got my 5th DUI. Officer: May I see the owner's card for this vehicle?Driver: It's not my car. I stole it. Officer: The car is stolen?Driver: That's right. But come to think of it, I think I saw the owner's card in the glove box when I was putting my gun in there. Officer: There's a gun in the glove box?Driver: Yes sir. That's where I put it after I shot and killed the woman who owns this car and stuffed her in the trunk. Officer: There's a BODY in the TRUNK?!?!?Driver: Yes, sir. Hearing this, the officer immediately called his captain. The car was quickly surrounded by police, and the captain approached the driver to handle the tense situation:Captain: Sir, can I see your license?Driver: Sure. Here it is. It was valid. Captain: Who's car is this?Driver: It's mine, officer. Here's the owner' card. The driver owned the car. Captain: Could you slowly open your glove box so I can see if there's a gun in it?Driver: Yes, sir, but there's no gun in it. Sure enough, there was nothing in the glove box. Captain: Would you mind opening your trunk? I was told you said there's a body in it. Driver: No problem. Trunk is opened; no body. Captain: I don't understand it. The officer who stopped you said you told him you didn't have a license, stole the car, had a gun in the glovebox, and that there was a dead body in the trunk. Driver: Yeah, I'll bet the liar told you I was speeding, too
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Divorce Joke
An elderly man in Phoenix calls his son in New York and says, 'I hate to ruin your day, but I have to tell you that your mother and I are divorcing; forty-five years of misery is enough. ' 'Pop, what are you talking about?' the son screams. 'We can't stand the sight of each other any longer, ' the old man says 'We're sick of each other, and I'm sick of talking about this, so you call your sister in Chicago and tell her, ' and he hangs up. Frantic, the son calls his sister, who explodes on the phone. 'Like hell they're getting divorced, ' she shouts, 'I'll take care of this. ' She calls Phoenix immediately, and screams at the old man, 'You are NOT getting divorced. Don't do a single thing until I get there. I'm calling my brother back, and we'll both be there tomorrow. Until then, don't do a thing, DO YOU HEAR ME?' and hangs up. The old man hangs up his phone, too, and turns to his wif e. 'Okay, ' he says, 'they're coming for Thanksgiving. Now what do we tell them for Christmas?'
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Funny Famous Joke
Women dream of world peace, a safe environment, and eliminatinghunger. What do men dream of?Being stuck in an elevator with the Doublemint twins.
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Stupid Men
No wonder men are so unhappy being men…
There is so little chance for advancement.
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Stupid Blonde Joke
Q: Did you hear about the blonde who attempted to drive to EuroDisney?
A: She saw a sign saying: 'EuroDisney Left' so she went home.
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Note : Many of our jokes have been
submitted by guests - if you find any that are offensive please let
us know and they will be removed immediately. |
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