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No animals were eaten, killed, maimed, wounded, slightly
injured, experimented on, tortured, eaten, sacrificed, frightened,
bullied, teased, humiliated, tickled, upset, ravished, tantalized,
pulled out of a hat, dishonoured or criticised during the making of this
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Welcome to our archive of jokes, riddles, poems and .
. . everything!!!
Over the years we have published over 100,000 jokes,
50,000 poems, 40,000 riddles, 20,000 pictures, 10,000 funny articles
and 2 combine harvesters.
So have a look around, enjoy and get those crops cut
as soon as possible!!!
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Joke Archive : 100,000 Fabulously Amusing Jokes |
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Archive of fun trivia quiz and other funny jokes |
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Religion Joke
Satanic Barney Proof Given: Barney is a CUTE PURPLE DINOSAUR Prove: Barney is satanic The Romans had no letter 'U
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Cow Joke
If you had a gun and you were being chased by a bull and a mountain lion, which one would you shoot first? The mountain lion. You can always shoot the bull!
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Knock Knock Joke - 1
Knock Knock!
Who's there?
Amos.
Amos who?
Amosquito bit me on the bum!
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Dog Joke - 2
When George Washington was a general, why did he like to have dogs around? They were very helpful during the 'Roverlutionary War!'
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Naughty Joke
A guy walks into a bar and sits down next to an extremely gorgeous woman. The first thing he notices about her though, are her pants. They were skin-tight, high-waisted and had no obvious mechanism (zipper, buttons or velcro) for opening them. After several minutes of puzzling over how she got the pants up over her hips, he finally worked up the nerve to ask her. 'Excuse me miss, but how do you get into your pants?' 'Well, ' she replied, 'you can start by buying me a drink. '
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Dumb Men Joke
There was a young man from KentWhose tool was exceedingly bentHe put it in doubleTo save himself troubleInstead of coming he wen
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School Joke for Kids
A Jewish family invited their Redneck neighbors over for holiday dinner. The first course was set in front of them and the Jewish couple announced, 'This is soup made with matzoh balls. 'On seeing the 2 large matzoh balls in the soup, the redneck man was hesitant to taste this strange looking brew. Gently, the Jewish couple urged him to, 'Just have a taste. If you don't like it, you don't have to finish it. 'Finally he agrees. He digs his spoon in, first picking up a small piece of matzoh ball with some soup in the spoon, and tasting it gingerly. The usual mmmm sound can be heard coming from somewhere deep in his chest, and he quickly finished the soup. 'That was delicious, ' he said, but I was wondering. . . 'Can you eat any other parts of the matzoh?'
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Kids Joke
A Kentucky teacher was quizzing her students. 'Johnny, who signed theDeclaration of Independence?' He said, 'Damn if I know. ' She was a littleput out by his swearing, so she told him to go home and to bring hisfather with him when he came back. Next day, the father came with his son, sat in the back of the room to observe. She started back in on her quizand finally got back to the boy. 'Now, Johnny, I'll ask you again. Whosigned the Declaration of Independence?' 'Well, hell, teacher, ' Johnnysaid, 'I told you I didn't know. ' The father jumped up in the back, pointed a stern finger at his son, and said, 'Johnny, if you signed thatdamn thing, hell, you damn well better admit it!'Sent by Kelly
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Note : Many of our jokes have been
submitted by guests - if you find any that are offensive please let
us know and they will be removed immediately. |
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