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No animals were eaten, killed, maimed, wounded, slightly
injured, experimented on, tortured, eaten, sacrificed, frightened,
bullied, teased, humiliated, tickled, upset, ravished, tantalized,
pulled out of a hat, dishonoured or criticised during the making of this
website. Some jokes however were severely tortured in an effort to make
them funny. |
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Welcome to our archive of jokes, riddles, poems and .
. . everything!!!
Over the years we have published over 100,000 jokes,
50,000 poems, 40,000 riddles, 20,000 pictures, 10,000 funny articles
and 2 combine harvesters.
So have a look around, enjoy and get those crops cut
as soon as possible!!!
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Joke Archive : 100,000 Fabulously Amusing Jokes |
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Archive of fun trips and other funny jokes |
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Bath Joke
Stan: I won 92 goldfish. Fred: Where are you going to keep them ? Stan: In the bathroom Fred: But what will you do when you want to take a bath ? Stan: Blindfold them !
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Aviation Joke
Tower: Lufthansa 893, youre number one, check for workers on the taxiway. Pilot: Roger . . . . . Weve checked, theyre all working.
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Food and Drink Joke
A couple of kids tried using pickles for a Ping-Pong game. They had the volley of the Dills.
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American Joke
Average Iraqi: Willing to participate in Holy War for his nation.
Average American: Willing to participate in People's Choice Awards.
Average Iraqi: Lines up by the thousands to die for country.
Average American: Will go to any extreme to avoid jury duty.
Average Iraqi: Has endured many food shortages during wars with Iran and embargo by West.
Average American: Shoves McDonalds' cashier if their Happy Meal doesn't include McCookies.
Average Iraqi: Has friend or relative wounded in ruthless wars of conquest.
Average American: Has beer-guzzling uncle who shot self in foot on hunting trip.
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Funny Kids Joke
What is worse than finding a maggot in your apple?Finding half an apple!
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Snake Joke
Why did the viper, viper nose ? Because the adder, adder hankerchief !
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Bumper Stickers - 2
Adults are just kids with overdrafts
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Hunting Joke
An avid duck hunter was in the market for a new bird dog. His search ended when he found a dog that could actually walk on water to retrieve a duck. Shocked by his find, he was sure none of his friends would ever believe him. He decided to try to break the news to a friend of his, the eternal pessimist who refused to be impressed with anything. This, surely, would impress him. He invited him to hunt with him and his new dog. As they waited by the shore, a flock of ducks flew by. they fired, and a duck fell. The dog responded and jumped into the water. The dog, however, did not sink but instead walked across the water to retrieve the bird, never getting more than his paws wet. This continued all day long; each time a duck fell, the dog walked across the surface of the water to retrieve it. The pessimist watched carefully, saw everything, but did not say a single word. On the drive home the hunter asked \r \nhis friend, 'Did you notice anything unusual about my new dog?' 'I sure did, ' responded the pessimist. 'He can't swim. '
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Note : Many of our jokes have been
submitted by guests - if you find any that are offensive please let
us know and they will be removed immediately. |
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