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No animals were eaten, killed, maimed, wounded, slightly
injured, experimented on, tortured, eaten, sacrificed, frightened,
bullied, teased, humiliated, tickled, upset, ravished, tantalized,
pulled out of a hat, dishonoured or criticised during the making of this
website. Some jokes however were severely tortured in an effort to make
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Welcome to our archive of jokes, riddles, poems and .
. . everything!!!
Over the years we have published over 100,000 jokes,
50,000 poems, 40,000 riddles, 20,000 pictures, 10,000 funny articles
and 2 combine harvesters.
So have a look around, enjoy and get those crops cut
as soon as possible!!!
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Joke Archive : 100,000 Fabulously Amusing Jokes |
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Archive of fun tents and other funny jokes |
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Knock Knock Joke - 2
Knock Knock Who's there ! Barbara ! Barbara who ? Barbara black sheep, have you any wool. . . !
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Dog Joke - 2
What is black and white and red all over?
A Dalmatian with a bad sunburn.
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Dieting Joke
Diets are for women who not only kept their girlish figure bit doubled it.
A diet is when you have to go to some length to change your width.
Many women reduce and reduce, yet still never manage to become a bargain.
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Various animal Joke
Why did the dolphin feel crabby? Because he ate too many crabs!
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Travel Humor
Once a couple were on vacation. The husband was lying on the beach facing downwards on his stomach & the wife was patting him on his butt. He happened to ask her what she was doing, she said 'I`m playing the Tabla' He turned around & told her 'Alright now you can start playing the flute'. Sent by Sowmya
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School Joke
A group of young children were sitting in a circle with their teacher. She was going around in turn asking them all questions.
'Davey, what sound does a cow make?'
Davey replied, 'It goes 'moo'. '
'Alice, what sound does a cat make?'
Alice said, 'It goes 'meow'. '
'Jamie, what sound does a lamb make?'
Jamie said, 'It goes 'baaa'. '
'Jennifer, what sound does a mouse make?'
Jennifer paused, and said, 'Uhh. . . it goes. . . 'click'!'
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Family Comedy Joke
So, four nuns die at about the same time, and are waiting at the pearly gates to consult St. Peter. He says, 'Next!'He asks the first nun, 'Before I let you into Heaven, I have to ask this: Have you ever come in contact with a penis?'The first nun says, embarrased, 'Well, I was a nurse for a while, Mr. Peter, so, yes, I had to touch a few penises in my time. . . 'St. Peter says, 'No problem! Just wash your hands out in that there fountain of holy water, and go right in!' So the nun washes her hands, and the gates spring open, the music plays, and the first nun walks right in. Then St. Peter asks the second nun, 'Have you ever come in contact with a penis?'The second nun says, embarrassed, 'Well, once I was trying to convert some people, and I wandered into a movie theater by accident. There was a penis on the screen. . . ''Not to worry!' laughs St. Peter. 'Just wash your eyes out in the fountain of holy water over there, and you're set!' So the nun washes her eyes, and the gates spring open, the music plays, and the second nun walks right in. Then St. Peter begins to ask the third nun. 'Have you ever come in cont. . . 'Suddenly, the fourth nun interrupts! 'Um, Mr. Peter, I reeeaaaallly have to go first!''Be patient, child, you'll have your turn, ' says St. Peter. He turns to the third one again. 'Now, have you ever come in contact with. . . ''Mr. PETER!!!!' The fourth one screams. 'I REALLY have to go first. ' 'I'll ask you in just a moment! I have to ask this young lady first!''NO WAY!' the fourth one says, practically fuming. 'I'm not gonna was out my mouth in that fountain after she washes her ass out in it!!'
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Stupid Blonde Joke
A blonde got lost in her car in a snow storm. She remembered what her dad had once told her. 'If you ever get stuck in a snow storm, wait for a snow plow and follow it'. Pretty soon a snow plow came by, and she started to follow it. She followed the plow for about forty-five minutes. Finally the driver of the truck got out and asked her what she was doing. She explained that her dad had told her if she ever got stuck in the snow, to follow a plow. The driver nodded and said, 'Well, I'm done with Wal-Mart; now you can follow me over to K-Mart. '
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Note : Many of our jokes have been
submitted by guests - if you find any that are offensive please let
us know and they will be removed immediately. |
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