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No animals were eaten, killed, maimed, wounded, slightly
injured, experimented on, tortured, eaten, sacrificed, frightened,
bullied, teased, humiliated, tickled, upset, ravished, tantalized,
pulled out of a hat, dishonoured or criticised during the making of this
website. Some jokes however were severely tortured in an effort to make
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Welcome to our archive of jokes, riddles, poems and .
. . everything!!!
Over the years we have published over 100,000 jokes,
50,000 poems, 40,000 riddles, 20,000 pictures, 10,000 funny articles
and 2 combine harvesters.
So have a look around, enjoy and get those crops cut
as soon as possible!!!
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Joke Archive : 100,000 Fabulously Amusing Jokes |
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Archive of fun spelling games and other funny jokes |
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Dumb Blonde Joke
Q: Why is it okay for blondes to catch a cold?
A: No need for em to worry about blowing their brains out.
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Aardvark Joke
What do you call a pickled aardvark?
A jarredvark!
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Bible Joke
A man finally goes with his wife to church. The man was so impressedwith the preacher's sermon he stopped on the way out to shake his hand. 'Preacher, I'll tell you, that was a DAMNED fine sermon. ' The preachersays 'Why thank you sir, but we don't used profanity in the house of the Lord'. The man says, 'But preacher, that was the best DAMNED sermon I ever heard. ' The preacher says again, 'sir I must be blunt, DO NOT use curse words in the Lords house again'. The man says 'Well I was so impressed with your sermon that Iplaced $1000 dollars in the collection plate'. The preacher says 'NO SHIT'?
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Stupid Men
Q: What did god say after he made Adam?
A: 'I can do better than that. ' then he made Eve.
Q: What do you call a man with half a brain?
A: Gifted
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Love and Marriage Joke
Good News, Bad News, Worse News Good: Your hubby and you agree, no more kids Bad: You can't find your birth control pills Worse: Your daughter borrowed them
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Cannibal Joke
Two cannibals were having lunch. 'Your girlfriend makes a great soup, ' said one to the other. 'Yes!' agreed the first. 'But, U'm going to miss her terribly. '
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Police Joke
'Take your hands off the car, and I'll make your birth certificate a worthless document. '
'If you run, you'll only go to jail tired. '
'Can you run faster than 1,200 feet per second? In case you didn't know, that is the average speed of a 9 mm bullet fired from my gun. '
'So you don't know how fast you were going. I guess that means I can write anything I want on the ticket, huh?'
'Warning! You want a warning? O. K. , I'm warning you not to do that again or I'll give you another ticket. '
'The answer to this last question will determine whether you are drunk or not. Was Mickey Mouse a cat or a dog?'
'Fair? You want me to be fair? Listen, fair is a place where you go to ride on rides, eat cotton candy, and step in monkey poop. '
'Yeah, we have a quota. Two more tickets and my wife gets a toaster oven. '
'Just how big were those two beers?'
'No sir, we don't have quotas anymore. We used to have quotas, but now we're allowed to write as many tickets as we want. '
'I'm glad to hear the Chief of Police is a good personal friend of yours. At least you know someone who can post your bail. '
'In God we trust, all others are suspects. '
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Women Joke
Why did the woman take a load of hay to bed? To feed her nightmare.
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Note : Many of our jokes have been
submitted by guests - if you find any that are offensive please let
us know and they will be removed immediately. |
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