|
|
|
The
Best Humor Sites on the Internet |
|
Christmas Jokes
Funny Jokes Online
MOCKERY
Ghost Pictures
Ghost Stories
Hilarious Horoscopes
Bizarre Webcam
notMENSA
society for the stupid
Cheap posters
Raunchiest Riddles
Worst Jobs in the World
Love Poems
Inspirational Poems
Funny Poems
Famous Poems
Free Diet Plans
Top Paying
Keywords
Keyword Suggestions
Everything you want to know about everything!
Weird eBay
mesothelioma types
Top 100 Baby Names
flowers online
Poker Articles
Free View Webcams
Work from Home
World History
Baby Name Chooser
Text Links
Online Advertising
Flowers
Top searches
Weird Website
Children's Books
Scottish Jokes
Robert Burns Poems
Midge Jokes
Fathers Jokes
Funny Jokes
Love Quotes
Famous Quotes
Inspirational Quotes
Funny Quotes
Movie Quotes
Friendship Quotes
Get Found
anime girls
5QS |
|
|
No animals were eaten, killed, maimed, wounded, slightly
injured, experimented on, tortured, eaten, sacrificed, frightened,
bullied, teased, humiliated, tickled, upset, ravished, tantalized,
pulled out of a hat, dishonoured or criticised during the making of this
website. Some jokes however were severely tortured in an effort to make
them funny. |
| |
|
|
Welcome to our archive of jokes, riddles, poems and .
. . everything!!!
Over the years we have published over 100,000 jokes,
50,000 poems, 40,000 riddles, 20,000 pictures, 10,000 funny articles
and 2 combine harvesters.
So have a look around, enjoy and get those crops cut
as soon as possible!!!
|
|
|
|
|
|
Joke Archive : 100,000 Fabulously Amusing Jokes |
|
|
|
Archive of fun photo frames and other funny jokes |
|
Irish Joke
An American tourist was driving in County Kerry, when his motor stopped. He got out to see if he could locate the trouble. A voice behind him said, 'The trouble is the carburetor. ' He turned around and only saw an old horse. The horse said again, 'It's the carburetor that's not working. ' The American nearly died with fright, and dashed into the nearest pub, had a large whiskey, and told Murphy the bartender what the horse had said to him. Murphy said, 'Well, don't pay any attention to him, he knows nothing about cars anyway. '
= = = = = = = = = =
Mental health Joke
Doctor, doctor, I feel so short! No problem. Hop up on the couch.
= = = = = = = = = =
Relationships Joke
A guy comes home from the bar drunk one night around 3 in the morning. His wife is sleeping and he is trying to sneak into bed. He's laying in bed for a few minutes and cuts a fart. His wife wakes up and asks, 'What the hell was that?' He replies, 'Touchdown, I am winning 7 nothing. ' She thinks to herself 'I'm gonna fix him. ' Then she lets one loose. He yells at her, 'What was that?' She replies 'Touchdown, tie score. ' Now he thinks, 'I'm gonna fix her. ' He's laying there for about 10 minutes trying to work one up. He tries so hard he shits in bed. The wife asks, 'Now what the hell was that?' He replied, 'Half time, switch sides. '
= = = = = = = = = =
Sad Joke
It's time to turn your computer off and read a book when. . . . 1. You wake up at 3 am to go to the bathroom and stop to check your e-mail on the way back to bed. 2. You name your children Eudora, AOL and dotcom. 3. You turn off your modem and get this awful empty feeling as if you just pulled the plug on a loved one. 4. You spend half of the plane trip with your laptop on your lap and your child in the overhead compartment. 5. You decide to stay in college for an additional year or two, just for the free Internet access. 6. You laugh at people with 14. 4 baud modems. 7. You start using smileys in your snail mail. 8. You find yourself typing 'com' after every period when using a word processor. com. 9. You refer to going to the bathroom as downloading. 10. You can't call your mother. . She doesn't have a modem. 11. You check you mail. It says 'no new messages'. So you check it again. 12. You don't know what gender three of your closest friends are because they have neutral screennames and you never bothered to ask. 13. You move into a new house and decide to netscape before you landscape. 14. You tell the cab driver you live at http://1000. edison. garden/house/brick. html15. You start tilting you head sideways to smile. 16. After reading this message, you immediately e-mail it to 10 friends.
= = = = = = = = = =
Sport Joke
Top NFL Complaints After shooting the blank gun to end the half, the Dallas Cowboy players start shooting back with live ammunition. Calling 'heads or tails' but never getting any. . . 'head' or 'tail'. Players get 'the wave'. . . refs get 'the finger'. Anyone who makes a call against the Detroit Lions risks pissing off their last remaining fan. With Reggie White retired, the penalty for 'Illegal use of a racial slur' is meaningless. Just when we thought it was safe to be an NFL Ref, we have to go back to frickin' CLEVELAND!!! Thanks to instant replay, picking nose during a game is twice as risky. Everyone else gets to wear their Autumn colors, but for me it's black and white week after week after week! Don King only bribes boxing judges. Official rule books not made in Braille. I'm the one that everybody wants to kill, so where's MY helmet and pads?!
= = = = = = = = = =
Joke for Speeches
A four year old girl was learning to say the Lord's Prayer. She was reciting it all by herself without help from her mother. She said, 'And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us some e-mail. '
= = = = = = = = = =
American Joke
Three travellers, an American, a Russian and an African, were
all on a world tour in a hot air balloon. The Russian man puts
his hand over the side and feels into the clouds.
'Aaah!' he said, 'We're right over my homeland. '
'How can you tell?' asked the American.
'I can feel the cold air' he replied.
A few days later the African man put his hand over the side into
the clouds.
'Aaah, we're right over my homeland' he said.
'How do you know that?' asked the Russian.
'I can feel the heat of the Desert. '
Several more days later the American put his hand over the side
into the clouds.
'Aaah, we're right over New York. ' The Russian and African were
amazed.
'How did you know all of that?' They exclaimed.
The American pulled his hand in and held it up for them to see.
'My watch is missing. '
= = = = = = = = = =
Dog Joke - 2
Why did the 3-legged dog go back to Dodge City? To see who shot his 'paw. '
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Note : Many of our jokes have been
submitted by guests - if you find any that are offensive please let
us know and they will be removed immediately. |
|
| |
|
