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No animals were eaten, killed, maimed, wounded, slightly
injured, experimented on, tortured, eaten, sacrificed, frightened,
bullied, teased, humiliated, tickled, upset, ravished, tantalized,
pulled out of a hat, dishonoured or criticised during the making of this
website. Some jokes however were severely tortured in an effort to make
them funny. |
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Welcome to our archive of jokes, riddles, poems and .
. . everything!!!
Over the years we have published over 100,000 jokes,
50,000 poems, 40,000 riddles, 20,000 pictures, 10,000 funny articles
and 2 combine harvesters.
So have a look around, enjoy and get those crops cut
as soon as possible!!!
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Joke Archive : 100,000 Fabulously Amusing Jokes |
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Archive of fun party ideas and other funny jokes |
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Top 100 Joke
A bear and a rabbit are taking a dump in the woods. The bear turns to the rabbit and asks, 'Do you have a problem with shit sticking to your fur?'The rabbit says, 'No, of course not!'So the bear wipes his ass with the rabbit!
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Joke for Holidays
There were three girls in a bar. One girl says. . . 'I can get a whole hand up my cunt!'Then the second girl says 'well, I can get a whole foot up mine!'Finally, the other girl says 'I don't mean to brag, but could you help me off this stool!'
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Fishing Joke
Why do penguins eat fish? Because donuts get soggy before they can catch them.
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Doctor Joke
A blond guy with two badly burned ears went to the emergency room for medical treatment.
'What happened' asked the doctor.
'Well, my wife was ironing while I was watching the ballgame on TV,' began the man.
'She put the hot iron near the telephone and when the phone rang, I answered the iron. '
The doctor nodded, 'But what happened to the other ear?'
'Well, no sooner had I hung up,' said the man, 'when the same guy called again. '
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Spoof Joke
A man and his wife were celebrating their 50th wedding anniversary at the same hotel in the same room where they spent their wedding night. In honor of the occasion, she bought a $400. 00 silk see-through negligee. After taking off her clothes in the bathroom, she realized that she had left the negligee in the suitcase. Coming out of the bathroom to get it, her husband remarked, 'Geez, for $400. '00
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Computer Joke
A man walks into a Silicon Valley pet store looking for a monkey. The storeowner points towards three identical looking monkeys in politically correct, animal-friendly natural mini-habitats. 'The one to the left costs $500,' says the storeowner. 'Why so much?' asks the customer. 'Because it can program in C,' answers the storeowner. The customer inquires about the next monkey and is told that 'That one costs $1500, because it knows Visual C++ and Object-Relational technology. ' The startled man then asks about the third monkey. 'That one costs $3000,' answers the storeowner. '$3000!' exclaims the man. 'What can that one do?' To which the owner replies, 'To be honest, I've never seen it do a single thing, but it calls itself a Consultant. '
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Ethnic Joke - 2
What did the redneck get on his I. Q. test?Drool.
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Dirty Joke
One day, little Mikey comes home from kindergarten for lunch. Not finding his mother in the kitchen, or the living room, he heads upstairs to check her bedroom. He opens the door, and what does he see, but his father, who had also come home for lunch, stripped naked, on top of his mother, also naked, heavily into the act of lovemaking. Not wanting to traumatize the boy, the parents continue as if nothing was wrong. Mikey watches, and after a couple of minutes asks, 'Daddy, can I climb on and have a horsy ride?' 'Of course, Son, we're a family. ' So Mikey climbs on and after a few more minutes his mother starts moaning and writhing wildly. 'Hang on Dad!', cries Mikey, 'this is where me and the mailman usually fall off!'
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Note : Many of our jokes have been
submitted by guests - if you find any that are offensive please let
us know and they will be removed immediately. |
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