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No animals were eaten, killed, maimed, wounded, slightly
injured, experimented on, tortured, eaten, sacrificed, frightened,
bullied, teased, humiliated, tickled, upset, ravished, tantalized,
pulled out of a hat, dishonoured or criticised during the making of this
website. Some jokes however were severely tortured in an effort to make
them funny. |
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Welcome to our archive of jokes, riddles, poems and .
. . everything!!!
Over the years we have published over 100,000 jokes,
50,000 poems, 40,000 riddles, 20,000 pictures, 10,000 funny articles
and 2 combine harvesters.
So have a look around, enjoy and get those crops cut
as soon as possible!!!
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Joke Archive : 100,000 Fabulously Amusing Jokes |
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Archive of fun painting games and other funny jokes |
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Love and Marriage Joke
At a friend's wedding, the bridal party filled their car with balloons--all filled with laughing gas. They put them everywhere, under seats, in the glove box, etc. They popped the balloons, and everyone was relaxed and laughing. But balloons were popping all during the trip of their honeymoon. They said they enjoyed the trick.
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At Work Joke
A young man walked into the local welfare office, marched straight up to the counter and said, 'Hi, I hate drawing welfare. I would really rather find a job. The man behind the counter replied, 'Your timing is amazing. We've just got a listing from a very wealthy man who wants a chauffeur/bodyguard for his nympho daughter. You'll have to drive around in a big black Mercedes, but the suits, shirts, and ties are provided. Because of the long hours of this job, meals will also be provided. You will also be required to escort the young lady on her overseas holidays. The salary package is $'200
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Bumper Stickers - 5
If You Can't Dazzle Them With Brilliance, Riddle Them With Bullets.
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Mental health Joke
Patient: I'm really depressed. Therapist: I see. Yes. You are depressed. Patient: Nothing is going well. Therapist: Nothing well. Patient: I feel like killing myself. T: You're thinking of killing yourself. P: Yes, I'm going to do it NOW. T: You want to do it now. P: [Jumps out window. ] T: Woosh. Splat.
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Funniest Joke
A blonde ordered a pizza and the clerk asked if he should cut it in six or twelve pieces. She responded, 'Six, please. I could never eat twelve pieces. '
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Religious Joke
When the airline Captain announced they were flying over Salt Lake City, Utah, a woman told the man sitting beside her, 'I understand this is the home of the Mormon religion where husbands believe it's OK to have more than one wife. ' That's true, ' he replied, 'as a matter of fact I happen to be a Mormon myself and have nine wives. ' 'How disgusting, 'she said, 'you should be ashamed of yourself, such practices should be against the law and you ought to be hung. ' With a slight grin, he just said, 'Yes, mam I am. '
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Legal Humor
Two law partners leave their office and go to lunch. In the middle of lunch the junior partner slaps his forehead. 'Damn, ' he says. 'I forgot to lock the office safe before we left. ' His partner replies ' What are you worried about? We're both here. '
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Biologist Joke
How many biologists does it take to change a light bulb? Four. One to change it and three to write the environmental-impact statement.
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Note : Many of our jokes have been
submitted by guests - if you find any that are offensive please let
us know and they will be removed immediately. |
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