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No animals were eaten, killed, maimed, wounded, slightly
injured, experimented on, tortured, eaten, sacrificed, frightened,
bullied, teased, humiliated, tickled, upset, ravished, tantalized,
pulled out of a hat, dishonoured or criticised during the making of this
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Welcome to our archive of jokes, riddles, poems and .
. . everything!!!
Over the years we have published over 100,000 jokes,
50,000 poems, 40,000 riddles, 20,000 pictures, 10,000 funny articles
and 2 combine harvesters.
So have a look around, enjoy and get those crops cut
as soon as possible!!!
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Joke Archive : 100,000 Fabulously Amusing Jokes |
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Archive of fun general knowledge quiz and other funny jokes |
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Mad Joke
A woman and a baby come into the doctor's office. She is taken into an examining room and waits for the doctor. After arriving there, the doctor examines the baby, and finds him not gaining much weight and asks the woman, 'Is he breast fed or on the bottle?''Oh. . . he is breast fed!', replied the woman. 'Well then, strip down to your waist, ' orders the doctor. She takes off her top and bra and sits on the examing table. The doc starts pressing, kneading and pinching both breasts for quite a while in a very detailed and thorough examination. The doc motions to her to get dressed, then the doctor says -'No wonder this baby is so hungry. You don't have any milk!'The woman with a wry grin on her face responds. . . 'Well of course I don't. ''I'm his aunt - but I'm SURE GLAD I brought him in!'
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Knock Knock Joke - 3
Knock Knock Who's there ! Cameron ! Cameron who ? Cameron film are needed to take pictures !
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Hunting Joke
The big game hunter was showing his friends his hunting trophies. Drawing their attention to a lion skin rug on the floor he said, 'I shot this fellow in Africa. Didn't want to kill such a magnificent beast, of course, but it was either him or me. ' 'Well, ' said a guest, 'he certainly makes a much better rug than you would!'
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Situation Joke
The Director of the Scottish Tartans Museum, Dr Michael MacDonaldwas in America. An old lady fixed her gaze on his 17th Centurysporran and asked, 'What, exactly, do you keep in your scrotum?'
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Travel and tourist Joke
This woman is visiting in Israel and notices that her little travel alarm needs a battery. She looks for a watch repair shop and while she doesn't read Hebrew she finally sees a shop with clocks and watches in the window. She goes in and hands the man her clock. The man says, 'Madam, I don't repair clocks. I am a Mohel. I do circumcisions. ' She says, 'Why all the clocks in the window?' And he says, 'And what should I have in my window?'
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Aviation Joke
A young guy in a two-engine fighter was flying escort for a B-52 and generally being a nuisance, acting like a hotdog, flying rolls around the lumbering old bomber. The hotdog said over the air, 'Anything you can do, I can do better. ' The veteran bomber pilot answered, 'Try this hot-shot. ' The B-52 continued its flight, straight and level. Perplexed, the hotdog asked, 'So? What did you do?' 'I just shut down two engines, kid. '
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At Work Joke
Mary came back from lunch to find that all the girlsin the office had removed their clothes and were lying on the floor naked. She lost no time in taking off her dress and joining them, but as soon as she laid downthe girl on her right hissed, 'Turn over, Mary - this is a stock up, not an office party!'
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Weather Joke
Q: What's the difference between a horse and the weather? A: One is reined up and the other rains down.
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Note : Many of our jokes have been
submitted by guests - if you find any that are offensive please let
us know and they will be removed immediately. |
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