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No animals were eaten, killed, maimed, wounded, slightly
injured, experimented on, tortured, eaten, sacrificed, frightened,
bullied, teased, humiliated, tickled, upset, ravished, tantalized,
pulled out of a hat, dishonoured or criticised during the making of this
website. Some jokes however were severely tortured in an effort to make
them funny. |
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Welcome to our archive of jokes, riddles, poems and .
. . everything!!!
Over the years we have published over 100,000 jokes,
50,000 poems, 40,000 riddles, 20,000 pictures, 10,000 funny articles
and 2 combine harvesters.
So have a look around, enjoy and get those crops cut
as soon as possible!!!
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Joke Archive : 100,000 Fabulously Amusing Jokes |
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Archive of fun fundraising ideas and other funny jokes |
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Relationships Joke
A woman entered the hospital to deliver her 15th child. 'Congratulations, ' said the nurse, 'but don't you think this is enough?' The woman replied, 'Are you kidding? This is the only vacation I get each year. '
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Ethnic Joke - 1
For many years, the border between Poland and Russia was volatile. Due to a political shift, a farmer found that he was no longer a Russian, but had become a Pole. Thrilled, he told his wife, 'Thank God ! No more of those freezing Russian winters. '
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Aardvark Joke
Who has a long nose, wears a mask, and sits tall in the saddle? The Lone Aardvark!
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Military Joke
General McKenzie was in charge of the Navy, and he was visiting his colleague General Marshall, who was in charge of the Army. McKenzie arrives at the military camp and is greeted by Marshall. They both walk around the place, and McKensie asks: 'So how are your men?''Very well trained, Gral. McKenzie. ''I hope so. You see, my men over at the Navy are so well trained, you could see they're the bravest men all over the country. ' 'Well, my men are very brave, too. ''I'd like to see that. 'So Marshall calls private Cooper and says: 'Private Johnson! I want you to stop that tank coming here with your body!''Are you crazy? It'd kill me, you idiot! I'm out of here!' As private Johnson ran away, Marshall turned to a bewildered McKenzie and said:'You see? You have to be pretty brave to talk like that to a general. '
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Best Joke
A man was sitting at a bar enjoying an after-work cocktail when an exceptionally gorgeous & sexy young woman entered. She was so striking that the man could not take his eyes away from her. The young woman noticed his overly-attentive stare & walked directly toward him. Before he could offer his apologies for being so rude, the young woman said to him, I'll do anything, absolutely anything, that you want me to do, no matter how kinky, for $100 on one condition. 'Flabbergasted, the man asked what the condition was. The young woman replied, 'You have to tell me what you want me to do in just three words. 'The man considered her proposition for a moment, withdrew his wallet from his pocket & slowly counted out five $20 bills, which he pressed into the young woman's hand. He looked deeply into her eyes & slowly, meaningfully said. . . 'Paint my house. '
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Bumper Stickers - 6
Seen on an old, beat-up car: 'This is not an abandoned vehicle. '
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Book title Joke
How to Feed Elephants by P. Nutts
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Christmas Joke - 1
Doctor, Doctor, Father Christmas gives us oranges every Christmas. Now I think I'm turning into an orange! Have you tried playing squash?
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Note : Many of our jokes have been
submitted by guests - if you find any that are offensive please let
us know and they will be removed immediately. |
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