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No animals were eaten, killed, maimed, wounded, slightly
injured, experimented on, tortured, eaten, sacrificed, frightened,
bullied, teased, humiliated, tickled, upset, ravished, tantalized,
pulled out of a hat, dishonoured or criticised during the making of this
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Welcome to our archive of jokes, riddles, poems and .
. . everything!!!
Over the years we have published over 100,000 jokes,
50,000 poems, 40,000 riddles, 20,000 pictures, 10,000 funny articles
and 2 combine harvesters.
So have a look around, enjoy and get those crops cut
as soon as possible!!!
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Joke Archive : 100,000 Fabulously Amusing Jokes |
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Archive of fun drum gillingham and other funny jokes |
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Humor Joke
A man was given the job of painting the white lines down the middle of a highway. On his first day he painted six miles; the next day three miles; the following day less than a mile. When the foreman asked the man why he kept painting less each day, he replied 'I just can't do any better. Each day I keep getting farther away from the paint can. '
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Cow Joke
What would you get if you crossed a cow with a rabbit? Hare in your milk!
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Aviation Joke
The German controllers at Frankfurt Airport were often short-tempered. They not only expected you to know your parking location but how to get there without any assistance from them. So it was with some amusement that we (PanAm 747) listened to the following exchange between Frankfurt ground and a British Airways 747 (radio call Speedbird 206) after landing. Speedbird 206: 'Good morning Frankfurt, Speedbird 206 clear of the active. ' Ground: 'Guten morgan, taxi to your gate. ' The British Airways 747 pulls onto the main taxiway and stops. Ground: 'Speedbird, do you not know where you are going?' Speedbird 206: 'Stand by, ground, I'm looking up the gate location now. ' Ground (with typical German impatience): 'Speedbird '206
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Rabbit Joke
What do you call a dumb bunny? A hare brain.
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Waiter Joke
Waiter, there's a fly in my custard ! I'll fetch him a spoon sir !
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Satire Joke
A blonde wanted to sell her old car, but nobody wished to buy a car with '250
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Joke for Dummies
A man was walking in the city, when he was accosted by a particularly dirty and shabby-looking bum who asked him for a couple of dollars for dinner. The man took out his wallet, extracted two dollars and asked, 'If I gave you this money, will you take it and buy whiskey?' 'No, I stopped drinking years ago, ' the bum said. 'Will you use it to gamble?' 'I don't gamble. I need everything I can get just to stay alive. ' 'Will you spend the money on greens fees at a golf course?' 'Are you NUTS! I haven't played golf in 20 years!' The man said, 'Well, I'm not going to give you two dollars. Instead, I'm going to take you to my home for a terrific dinner cooked by my wife. ' The bum was astounded. 'Won't your wife be furious with you for doing that? I know I'm dirty, and I probably smell pretty bad. ' The man replied, 'That's OK. I just want her to see what a man looks like who's given up drinking, gambling, and golf. '
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Yo momma Joke
yo mama's teeth so yellow that when she smiles everyone sings, 'i got sunshine on a cloudy day'. . . . .
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Note : Many of our jokes have been
submitted by guests - if you find any that are offensive please let
us know and they will be removed immediately. |
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