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No animals were eaten, killed, maimed, wounded, slightly
injured, experimented on, tortured, eaten, sacrificed, frightened,
bullied, teased, humiliated, tickled, upset, ravished, tantalized,
pulled out of a hat, dishonoured or criticised during the making of this
website. Some jokes however were severely tortured in an effort to make
them funny. |
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Welcome to our archive of jokes, riddles, poems and .
. . everything!!!
Over the years we have published over 100,000 jokes,
50,000 poems, 40,000 riddles, 20,000 pictures, 10,000 funny articles
and 2 combine harvesters.
So have a look around, enjoy and get those crops cut
as soon as possible!!!
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Joke Archive : 100,000 Fabulously Amusing Jokes |
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Archive of fun days out for children and other funny jokes |
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Celebrities Joke
Mike Tyson gets out of jail and proceeds to do what he does best. . . find a woman with whom he may 'commiserate'. After a wild night of getting it on, it's time for the young lady to leave. As she's getting dressed, she and Mike are having a conversation. She says, 'Lotsa guys want to know how it was. Well, I have good news and bad news for you. Which would you like first?' Mike thinks for a moment and says, 'What the hell, give me the good news. ' She tells him, 'The good news is that you're bigger than Magic Johnson. '
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Vampire Joke
Did you hear about the doctor who crossed a parrot with a vampire ? It bit his neck, sucked his blood, and said, 'Who's a pretty boy then ?'!
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Joke for Speeches
A young couple got married and they've never made love before. On their wedding night, the new bride is quite anxious to get things going, but the man seemed to be having some difficulty. Finally, he starts to undress. When he takes off his pants, she notices that his knees are deeply pockmarked and scarred. So his wife says, 'What happened to you?' The man says, 'When I was young, I had the kneesles. 'He then takes off his socks and his wife sees that his toes are all mangled and deformed. 'Hmmm, well what happened to your feet?' inquires the wife. 'When I was a young boy, I had tolio. 'So, finally, the man takes off his shorts and the woman replies, 'Don't tell me. Smallcox, right!?'
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Stupid Blonde Joke
How did the blond break her leg while raking leaves?She fell out of the treesent by Chris
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Dirty Joke
One night, as a couple lay down for bed, the husband gently taps his wife on the shoulder and starts rubbing her arm. The wife turns over and says 'I'm sorry honey, I've got a gynecologist appointment tomorrow and I want to stay fresh. ' The husband, rejected, turns over and tries to sleep. A few minutes later, he rolls back over and taps his wife again. This time he whispers in her ear, 'Do you have a dentist appointment tomorrow too?'
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Bumper Stickers - 1
Always remember you're unique, just like everyone else.
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Various animal Joke
A man moved to a mountain top to get rid of the hustle and be alone. One day he heard a knock at the door and no one was there but then he looked down and there sat a snail and it said 'it is quite cold out here can I come in?' the man shouted 'NO why don't you all understand I want to be alone!' and he kicked the snail down the mountain. One year later there was a knock at the door and no one was there and then he looked down and there again sat a snail and it said, 'What did you do that for?'
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Religious Joke
Q: Why do they say 'Amen' at the end of a prayer instead of 'Awomen'? A: The same reason they sing Hymns instead of Hers!
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Note : Many of our jokes have been
submitted by guests - if you find any that are offensive please let
us know and they will be removed immediately. |
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