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No animals were eaten, killed, maimed, wounded, slightly
injured, experimented on, tortured, eaten, sacrificed, frightened,
bullied, teased, humiliated, tickled, upset, ravished, tantalized,
pulled out of a hat, dishonoured or criticised during the making of this
website. Some jokes however were severely tortured in an effort to make
them funny. |
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Welcome to our archive of jokes, riddles, poems and .
. . everything!!!
Over the years we have published over 100,000 jokes,
50,000 poems, 40,000 riddles, 20,000 pictures, 10,000 funny articles
and 2 combine harvesters.
So have a look around, enjoy and get those crops cut
as soon as possible!!!
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Joke Archive : 100,000 Fabulously Amusing Jokes |
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Archive of fun city fareham and other funny jokes |
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Dumb Joke
A man was helping one of his cows give birth, when he noticed his 11-year-old son standing wide-eyed at the fence, soaking in the whole event. The man thought, 'Great. . . he's 11 and now I'm gonna have to start explaining the birds and bees. No need to jump the gun - I'll just let him ask, and I'll answer. 'After everything was over, the man walked over to his son and said, 'Well son, do you have any questions?''Just one Dad. ' gasped the still wide-eyed lad. Just as the father is preparing his birds and bees story, his son asks -'How fast was that calf going when he hit that cow?'
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Salesmen Joke
A salesman was demonstrating unbreakable combs in a department store. He was impressing the people who stopped by to look by putting the comb through all sorts of torture and stress. Finally to impress even the skeptics in the crowd, he bent the comb completely in half, and it snapped with a loud crack. Without missing a beat, he bravely held up both halves of the 'unbreakable' comb for everyone to see and said, 'And this, ladies and gentlemen, is what an unbreakable comb looks like on the inside. '
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Telephone Joke
Caller: My goodness, Operator! Your nose is so stuffed up, I can't understand you. You should really take something for that cold. Operator: Good idea. I'll take the rest of the day off!
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School Joke for Kids
One day, shortly after the birth of their new baby, the mother had to go out to run some errands. The proud papa stayed home to watch his wonderful new son. Soon after the mother left, the baby started to cry. The father did everything he could think of doing, but the baby wouldn't stop crying. Finally, the dad got so worried that he decided to take the infant to the doctor. After the doctor listened to the father relate all that he had done to get the baby to stop crying, the doctor began to examine the baby's ears, chest and then down to the diaper area. When he undid the diaper, he found that the diaper was indeed full. 'Here's the problem', the Dr. said, 'He needs to be changed!' The father was very perplexed, 'But the diaper package says it is good for up to 10 lbs. !'
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Bar Joke , beer, booze and fun!
How do barmen surf the web? On the Gin-ternet.
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Teeth Joke
What did the tooth say to the dentist? 'Fill 'er up!'
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Dog Joke - 1
Q. Why is a dog scared of a fire? A. It doesn't want to become a hot dog.
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Children Joke
Will and Bill were quarrelling about whose father was the stronger. Will said, ' Well, you know the Pacific Ocean ? My father's the one who dug the hole for it. ' Bill wasn't impressed, ' Well, That's nothing. You know the Dead Sea ? My father's the one who killed it !
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Note : Many of our jokes have been
submitted by guests - if you find any that are offensive please let
us know and they will be removed immediately. |
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