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No animals were eaten, killed, maimed, wounded, slightly
injured, experimented on, tortured, eaten, sacrificed, frightened,
bullied, teased, humiliated, tickled, upset, ravished, tantalized,
pulled out of a hat, dishonoured or criticised during the making of this
website. Some jokes however were severely tortured in an effort to make
them funny. |
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Welcome to our archive of jokes, riddles, poems and .
. . everything!!!
Over the years we have published over 100,000 jokes,
50,000 poems, 40,000 riddles, 20,000 pictures, 10,000 funny articles
and 2 combine harvesters.
So have a look around, enjoy and get those crops cut
as soon as possible!!!
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Joke Archive : 100,000 Fabulously Amusing Jokes |
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Archive of fortieth birthday jokes and other funny jokes |
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Science Joke
What's a famous saying at a gay bar? May I push in your stool. Sent by Jeff
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Dumb Men Joke
Q: What does a man and a floor have in common? A: You lay them right the first time you can walk all over them forever!!
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Kids Puns
One way to live together and never have an argument is for both husband and wife to be hard-of-hearing. . . and to share the same hearing aid.
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Assorted Joke
What's the difference between a Train and Teacher?A train says, 'Chew, Chew!' and a Teacher says, 'Spit the gum out!'
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Knock Knock Joke - 1
Knock Knock Who's there ! Adore ! Adore who ? Adore stands between us, open up !
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Stupid Blonde Joke
51 DAYSA bartender is sitting behind the bar on a typical day, when the door burstsopen and in come four exuberant blondes. They come up to th bar, order fivebottles of champagne and ten glasses, take their order over and sit down at alarge table. The corks are popped, the glasses are filled and they begintoasting and chanting, '51 days, 51 days, 51 days!' Soon, three more blondesarrive, take up their drinks and the chanting grows. '51 days, 51 days, 51days!' Two more blondes show up and soon their voices are joined in raisingthe roof. '51 days, 51 days, 51 days!' Finally, the tenth blonde comes in witha picture under her arm. She walks over to the table, sets the picture in themiddle and the table erupts. Up jumps the others, they begin dancing aroundthe table, exchanging high-fives, all the while chanting '51 days, 51 days, 51days!'The bartender can't contain his curiosity any longer, so he walks over to thetable. There in the center is a beautifully framed child's puzzle of theCookie Monster. When the frenzy dies down a little bit, the bartender asksone of the blondes, 'What's all the chanting and celebration about?The blonde who brought in the picture pipes in, 'Everyone thinks that blondesare dumb and they make fun of us. So, we decided to set the record straight. Ten of us got together, bought that puzzle and put it together. . . the side ofthe box said 2-4 years, but we put it together in 51 days ! '
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School Joke
Teacher: Where is the English Channel ? Pupil: I don't know, my TV doesn't pick it up
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Mother Joke
A man called his mother in Florida. 'Mom, how are you?'
'Not too good,' said the mother. 'I've been very weak. '
The son said, 'Why are you so weak?'
She said, 'Because I haven't eaten in 38 days. '
The man said, 'That's terrible. Why haven't you eaten in 38 days?'
The mother answers, 'Because I didn't want my mouth to be filled with food if you should call. '
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Note : Many of our jokes have been
submitted by guests - if you find any that are offensive please let
us know and they will be removed immediately. |
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