|
|
|
The
Best Humor Sites on the Internet |
|
Christmas Jokes
Funny Jokes Online
MOCKERY
Ghost Pictures
Ghost Stories
Hilarious Horoscopes
Bizarre Webcam
notMENSA
society for the stupid
Cheap posters
Raunchiest Riddles
Worst Jobs in the World
Love Poems
Inspirational Poems
Funny Poems
Famous Poems
Free Diet Plans
Top Paying
Keywords
Keyword Suggestions
Everything you want to know about everything!
Weird eBay
mesothelioma types
Top 100 Baby Names
flowers online
Poker Articles
Free View Webcams
Work from Home
World History
Baby Name Chooser
Text Links
Online Advertising
Flowers
Top searches
Weird Website
Children's Books
Scottish Jokes
Robert Burns Poems
Midge Jokes
Fathers Jokes
Funny Jokes
Love Quotes
Famous Quotes
Inspirational Quotes
Funny Quotes
Movie Quotes
Friendship Quotes
Get Found
anime girls
5QS |
|
|
No animals were eaten, killed, maimed, wounded, slightly
injured, experimented on, tortured, eaten, sacrificed, frightened,
bullied, teased, humiliated, tickled, upset, ravished, tantalized,
pulled out of a hat, dishonoured or criticised during the making of this
website. Some jokes however were severely tortured in an effort to make
them funny. |
| |
|
|
Welcome to our archive of jokes, riddles, poems and .
. . everything!!!
Over the years we have published over 100,000 jokes,
50,000 poems, 40,000 riddles, 20,000 pictures, 10,000 funny articles
and 2 combine harvesters.
So have a look around, enjoy and get those crops cut
as soon as possible!!!
|
|
|
|
|
|
Joke Archive : 100,000 Fabulously Amusing Jokes |
|
|
|
Archive of fish r fun tanks and other funny jokes |
|
Strange Humor
Two priests and a rabbi were discussing what portion of the weekly collection they kept for themselves. The first priest explained that he drew a circle on the ground, stepped a few paces back and pitched the money towards the circle. What landed in the circle he kept and what landed outside the circle God kept. The second priest claimed that his method was almost the same, except that what landed outside the circle went to the priest and the money that landed inside the circle God kept. The rabbi said, 'I've got you both beat. I throw ALL the money into the air, and what God wants, God takes!'
= = = = = = = = = =
Animal World
A man rented a camel to make a trip to an important customer out in the desert. There was only one camel available, and it had one little problem, the guy told him. Periodically, this camel would stop and refuse to move until somebody beat it off. The man is desperate, so he decides he will go along with that. He sets off into the desert. Sure as hell, he has to beat off the camel every day for the first three days. On the fourth day, the camel stops again and refuses to move, so the guy gets down and prepares to do his duty, but the camel quickly steps aside. He tries again, And again. Finally in exasperation he walks in front of the camel and says 'For Christ's sake, what do you want now?' The camel puckers up and makes little sucking noises.
= = = = = = = = = =
Miscellaneous Joke
A little old lady sits at the luncheonette counter and orders ahamburger. The huge guy behind the counter bellows, 'ONE BURGER!'The cook, who's even bigger, screams, 'BUR-GER!'Whereupon he grabs a huge hunk of chopped meat, stuffs it inhis bare armpit, pumps his arm a few times to squeeze it flat, and tosses it on the grill. The old lady says, 'That's the most disgusting thing I've everseen!'The counterman says, 'Yeah? You should be here in themorning when he makes the doughnuts!'and orders ahamburger. The huge guy behind the counter bellows, 'ONE BURGER!'The cook, who's even bigger, screams, 'BUR-GER!'Whereupon he grabs a huge hunk of chopped meat, stuffs it inhis bare armpit, pumps his arm a few times to squeeze it flat, and tosses it on the grill. The old lady says, 'That's the most disgusting thing I've everseen!'The counterman says, 'Yeah? You should be here in themorning when he makes the doughnuts!'
= = = = = = = = = =
Great Joke
Q: What do blondes and spaghetti have in common?A: They both wriggle when you eat them.
= = = = = = = = = =
Bumper Stickers - 1
Seen it all, done it all, can't remember most of it.
= = = = = = = = = =
Criminal Joke
What is the difference between a thief and a church bell? One steals from the people, the other peals, from the steeple.
= = = = = = = = = =
Dog Joke - 1
A wealthy man decided to go on a safari in Africa. He took his faithful pet dog along for company. One day the dog starts chasing butterflies and before long he discovers that he is lost. So, wandering about he notices a leopard heading rapidly in his direction with the obvious intention of having lunch.
The dog thinks, 'Boyo, I'm in deep s**t . ' Then he noticed some bones on the ground close by, and immediately settles down to chew on the bones with his back to the approaching cat.
Just as the leopard is about to leap, the dog exclaims loudly, 'Man, that was one delicious leopard. I wonder if there are any more around here?'
Hearing this the leopard halts his attack in mid stride, as a look of terror comes over him, and slinks away into the trees. 'Whew', says the leopard. 'That was close. That dog nearly had me. '
Meanwhile, a monkey who had been watching the whole scene from a nearby tree, figures he can put this knowledge to good use and trade it for protection from the leopard. So, off he goes. But the dog saw him heading after the leopard with great speed, and figured that something must be up.
The monkey soon catches up with the leopard, spills the beans and strikes a deal for himself with the leopard. The cat is furious at being made a fool of and says, 'Here monkey, hop on my back and see what's going to happen to that conniving canine. '
Now the dog sees the leopard coming with the monkey on his back, and thinks,' What am I going to do now?' But instead of running, the dog sits down with his back to his attackers pretending he hasn't seen them yet. And just when they get close enough to hear, the dog says, 'Where's that monkey. I just can never trust him. I sent him off half an hour ago to bring me another leopard, and he's still not back!!'
= = = = = = = = = =
Top 100 Joke
There was this city doctor who started a practice in the countryside. He once had to go to a farm to attend to a sick farmer who lived there. After a few housecalls he stopped coming to the farm. The puzzled farmer finally phoned him to ask whats the matter, didn't he like him or somethin'. The doctor replied, 'No, its your ducks at the entrance. . . Every time I enter the farm, they insult me!'
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Note : Many of our jokes have been
submitted by guests - if you find any that are offensive please let
us know and they will be removed immediately. |
|
| |
|
