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No animals were eaten, killed, maimed, wounded, slightly
injured, experimented on, tortured, eaten, sacrificed, frightened,
bullied, teased, humiliated, tickled, upset, ravished, tantalized,
pulled out of a hat, dishonoured or criticised during the making of this
website. Some jokes however were severely tortured in an effort to make
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Welcome to our archive of jokes, riddles, poems and .
. . everything!!!
Over the years we have published over 100,000 jokes,
50,000 poems, 40,000 riddles, 20,000 pictures, 10,000 funny articles
and 2 combine harvesters.
So have a look around, enjoy and get those crops cut
as soon as possible!!!
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Joke Archive : 100,000 Fabulously Amusing Jokes |
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Archive of emily the strange shoes and other funny jokes |
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Apple Joke
First apple: You look down in the dumps. What's eating you? Second apple: Worms, I think.
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Worst Joke
How to identify a Canadian driver:1. - One hand on wheel, one hand on horn: MONTREAL2. - One hand on wheel, one finger out window: TORONTO3. - One hand on wheel, one finger out window, cutting across all lanes of traffic: OTTAWA4. - Both hands on wheel, eyes shut, both feet on brake, quivering in terror: SASKATOON, but driving in TORONTO5. - Both hands in air, gesturing, both feet on accelerator, head turned to talk to someone in the back seat: QUEBEC CITY6. - One hand on 12 oz. double shot latte, one knee on wheel, cradling cell phone, foot on brake, mind on radio game, banging head on steering wheel while stuck in traffic: VANCOUVER7. - One hand on wheel, one hand on hunting rifle, alternating between both feet being on the brake and both feet on the accelerator, throwing McDonald's bag out the window: RED DEER8. - Four wheel drive pick-up truck, shotgun mounted in rear window, beer cans on the floor, raccoon tails attached to the antenna: PRINCE GEORGE9. - Two hands gripping wheel, blue hair barely visible above windshield driving 40 km/hr on Hwy 1 in the left lane with the left blinker on: VICTORIA10. - One ski-doo mitt on steering wheel, one ski-doo mitt scrapper in hand out front window scrapping frost, Guess Who on 8 track playing Share The Land, hockey equipment smelling up car interior, waiting at lights for snow removal equipment to finish clearing intersection: WINNIPEG
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Website Joke
Why do goalkeepers spend ages on the Internet? Because they can't stop saving their work.
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Bumper Stickers - 6
Overdrawn? But I still have checks left!
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Just for Laughs Joke
OXYMORONS. . . Act naturally Found missingResident alienAdvanced BASIC Genuine imitationSafe sexAirline food Good grief Same differenceAlmost exactlyGovernment organizationSanitary landfillAlone togetherLegally drunk Silent screamBritish fashion Living dead Small crowdBusiness ethicsMicrosoft WorksSoft rock Butt headMilitary intelligenceSoftware documentationCalifornia cultureNew classic Sweet sorrow Childproof'Now, then . . . 'Synthetic natural gas Christian ScientistsPassive aggression Taped live Clearly misunderstoodPeace force Temporary tax increase Computer jockPlastic glasses Terribly pleased Computer securityPolitical science Tight slacksDefinite maybePretty ugly Twelve-ounce pound cake Diet ice creamRap music Working vacation Exact estimateReligious tolerance
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Monster Joke
Did you hear about the monster who had an extra pair of hands? Where did he keep them? In a handbag.
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Bar Joke - 2
The top 10 reasons for Mike Tyson biting Evander Holyfield's ear:10. Got a little carried away after seeing 'Face/Off'9. Really wanted to win first prize on 'America's Funniest Home Videos'8. Like this doesn't happen every year in the Masters7. Whenever Moe bites Curly's ear, it's hilarious!6. Has to do this kind of thing to compensate for the fact that he talks like Melanie Griffith 5. I guess you've never heard of a little thing called 'strategy'4. Ears is tasty3. It was self-defense -- he wouldn't stop punching me!2. 'Disqualified' sounds better than 'got his ass kicked all over the ring' 1. He ran out of gum
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Joke Online
Q: Did you hear about the Indian who drank 200 cups of tea?A: He drowned in his TeePee!
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Note : Many of our jokes have been
submitted by guests - if you find any that are offensive please let
us know and they will be removed immediately. |
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