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No animals were eaten, killed, maimed, wounded, slightly
injured, experimented on, tortured, eaten, sacrificed, frightened,
bullied, teased, humiliated, tickled, upset, ravished, tantalized,
pulled out of a hat, dishonoured or criticised during the making of this
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Welcome to our archive of jokes, riddles, poems and .
. . everything!!!
Over the years we have published over 100,000 jokes,
50,000 poems, 40,000 riddles, 20,000 pictures, 10,000 funny articles
and 2 combine harvesters.
So have a look around, enjoy and get those crops cut
as soon as possible!!!
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Joke Archive : 100,000 Fabulously Amusing Jokes |
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Archive of edinburgh fun run and other funny jokes |
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Baby Joke
I got a letter from my sister. She just had a baby. But she didn't say whether it's a boy or girl. So I don't know if I'm an uncle or an aunt.
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Money Joke
Farmer: What would you do if a bull charged you? Mary: I'd pay whatever it charged.
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Funny Famous Joke
Snappy answers to sappy questions:All your puny problems solved in 10 words or less!Q: Dear Abby, What can I do about my little brother? He's such a pest!A: Have you tried a flyswatter?Q: Dear Abby, My boss is a mean, unappreciative slave driver who constantly belittles me. What can I do?A: Shut up and get back to work!Q: Dear Abby, My dad insists I clean my room! How can I get out of this?A: Get a new dad. Q: Dear Abby, Why are you so lazy?A: Dear loser, Why are you so stupid? Next question. Q: Dear Abby, Help! I need to lose weight! How can I stop eating all the fattening foods I love?A: Send them to me and I'll eat them for you.
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Dumb Men Joke
Why does a man only get half-hour lunch-breaks? So his boss doesn't have to retrain him.
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Ethnic Joke - 1
Q: If Tarzan and Jane were Jewish, what would Cheetah be?A: A fur coat.
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Blonde Joke - 3
A blonde, out of money and down on her luck after buying air at a real bargain, needed money desperately. To raise cash, she decided to kidnap a child and hold him for ransom. She went to the local playground, grabbed a kid randomly, took her behind a building, and told her, 'I've kidnapped you. 'She then wrote a big note saying, 'I've kidnapped your kid. Tomorrow morning, put $'10
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Dog Joke - 2
What sort of clothes does a pet dog wear ? A petticoat !
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Bar Joke , beer, booze and fun!
A guy goes up to this girl in a bar and says, 'Would you like to dance?' The girl says, 'I don't like this song, but even if I did, I wouldn't dance with you. ' The guy says, 'I'm sorry, you must have misunderstood me, I said you look fat in those pants. '
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Note : Many of our jokes have been
submitted by guests - if you find any that are offensive please let
us know and they will be removed immediately. |
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