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Welcome to our archive of jokes, riddles, poems and .
. . everything!!!
Over the years we have published over 100,000 jokes,
50,000 poems, 40,000 riddles, 20,000 pictures, 10,000 funny articles
and 2 combine harvesters.
So have a look around, enjoy and get those crops cut
as soon as possible!!!
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Joke Archive : 100,000 Fabulously Amusing Jokes |
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Archive of dr strange movie and other funny jokes |
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Humor Joke
Q. Is it possible to kill a mother-in-law with newspaper? A. Yes, if you wrap an iron in it.
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Movie and TV Joke
Why did Captain Kirk go into the ladies toilet ? To boldly go where no man has been before !
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Government Humor
Why doesn't Hillary wear short dress?Her balls would show.
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Mad Joke
Little Johnny was sitting in class one day. On this particular day, the teacher wanted to ask her class which part of the body went to heaven first. One little girl raised her hand and said, 'I think your mind goes to heaven first because you have to have a mind in order to believe in God. The teacher praises the little girl, as a little boy raised his hand. The little boy says, 'I think your heart goes to heaven first because God is all about love. 'Very good' said the teacher. The teacher looked up and saw Little Johnny's hand up. 'Oh no', she thought, 'I'm not gonna like this. Little Johnny, which part of the body do you think goes to heaven first?'Little Johnny thinks for a minute and says, 'Your feet. ' The teacher asked him why he thought your feet go to heaven first. He replied, 'Well, I was walking past my parents' bedroom last night and my mom had her feet up in the air and she said, 'Oh God, I'm coming!''
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Car and train Joke
Auntie Maud bought herself a new rear-engine European car. She took an old friend for a drive, but after only half a mile the car broke down. Both women got out and opened up the front of the car. 'Oh. Maud, ' said her friend, 'you've lost your engine!' 'Never mind, dear, ' said auntie. 'I've got a spare one in the trunk. '
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Rabbit Joke
What do you call a man with a rabbit up his jumper ? Warren !
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Comedian Joke
I was in a good mood last week. I entered a competition and won a years supply of marmite. . . . . one jar!
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Joke for Speeches
Here's a list of some cute letters kids have written to God:Dear GOD:Instead of letting people die and having to make new ones, why don't You just keep the ones You have? - JaneDear GOD:Maybe Cain and Abel would not kill each other so much if they had their own rooms. It works with my brother. - LarryDear GOD:If You watch me in church on Sunday, I'll show You my new shoes. - MickeyDear GOD:I bet it is very hard for You to love all of everybody in the whole world. There are only 4 people in our family and I can never do it. - NanDear GOD:In school they told us what You do. Who does it when You are on vacation? - JaneDear GOD:I read the Bible. What does 'beget' mean? Nobody will tell me. - Love, AlisonDear GOD:Are You really invisible or is it just a trick? - LucyDear GOD:Is it true my father won't get in Heaven if he uses his bowling words in the house? AnitaDear GOD:Did You mean for the giraffe to look like that or was it an accident? -NormaDear GOD:Who draws the lines around the countries? - NanDear GOD:I went to this wedding and they kissed right in church. Is that okay? -NeilDear GOD:What does it mean You are a Jealous God? I thought You had everything. -JaneDear GOD:Did You really mean 'do unto others as they do unto you'? Because if You did, then I'm going to fix my brother. - DarlaDear GOD:Thank you for the baby brother, but what I prayed for was a puppy. - JoyceDear GOD:It rained for our whole vacation and is my father mad! He said some things about You that people are not supposed to say, but I hope You will not hurt him anyway. Your friend, (But I am not going to tell You who I am)Dear GOD:Why is Sunday school on Sunday? I thought it was supposed to be our day of rest. Tom L. Dear GOD:Please send me a pony. I never asked for anything before. You can look it up. BruceDear GOD:If we come back as something else, please don't let me be MaryHorton - because I hate her. - DeniseDear GOD:If you give me a genie like Aladdin, I will give You anything You want, except my money or my chess set. - RaphaelDear GOD:I want to be just like my Daddy when I get big but not with so much hair all over. - SamDear GOD:You don't have to worry about me. I always look both ways. - DeanDear GOD:I think the stapler is one of your greatest inventions. Ruth M. Dear GOD:I think about You sometimes even when I'm not praying - ElliottDear GOD:Of all the people who work for You I like Noah and David the best. - RobDear GOD:My brother told me about being born but it doesn't sound right. They're just kidding, aren't they? - MarshaDear GOD:I would like to live 900 years like the guy in the Bible. - Love, ChrisDear GOD:We read Thomas Edison made light. But in Sunday school they said You did it So I bet he stole your idea. - Sincerely, DonnaDear GOD:The bad people laughed at Noah - 'You made an ark on dry land, you fool. ' But he was smart, he stuck with You. That's what I would do. - EddieDear GOD:I do not think anybody could be a better GOD. Well, I just want You to know but I am not just saying that because You are GOD already. - CharlesDear GOD:I didn't think orange went with purple until I saw the sunset You made on Tuesday. That was cool. - Eugene
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Note : Many of our jokes have been
submitted by guests - if you find any that are offensive please let
us know and they will be removed immediately. |
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