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injured, experimented on, tortured, eaten, sacrificed, frightened,
bullied, teased, humiliated, tickled, upset, ravished, tantalized,
pulled out of a hat, dishonoured or criticised during the making of this
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Welcome to our archive of jokes, riddles, poems and .
. . everything!!!
Over the years we have published over 100,000 jokes,
50,000 poems, 40,000 riddles, 20,000 pictures, 10,000 funny articles
and 2 combine harvesters.
So have a look around, enjoy and get those crops cut
as soon as possible!!!
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Joke Archive : 100,000 Fabulously Amusing Jokes |
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Archive of composer jokes and other funny jokes |
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Dieting Joke
People go to Weight Watchers to learn their lessens.
A diet is the modern-day meal in which a family counts its calories instead of its blessings.
A diet is what you go on when not only can't you fit into the store's dresses, you can't fit into the dressing room.
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Children Joke
A little boy and his dad are standing in line at the grocery store behind a big fat lady. The little boy says, 'hey dad, look how fat that lady is!''Shhhh, quiet son, she'll hear you. ''But dad, look how big and fat that lady is!''Shhhhhh, don't say that son, it's not nice!''But dad, look how big and fat that lady is!''Shhhhhhhhhhhhhh, don't say that son, it's not nice and it's rude!'Suddenly the fat lady's beeper goes off. 'Look out dad, she's backing up!'
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Law and Lawyer Joke
One day in Contract Law class, Professor Jepson asked one of his better students, 'Now if you were to give someone an orange, how would you go about it?' The student replied, 'Here's an orange. ' The professor was livid. 'No! No! Think like a lawyer!' The student then recited, 'Okay, I'd tell him, 'I hereby give and convey to you all and singular, my estate and interests, rights, claim, title, calim and advantages of and in, said orange, together with all its rind, juice, pulp, and seeds, and all rights and advantages with full power to bite, cut, freeze and otherwise eat, the same, or give the same away with and without the pulp, juice, rind and seeds, anything herein before or hereinafter or in any deed, or deeds, instruments of whatever nature or kind whatsoever to the contrary in anywise notwithstanding. . . '
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School Joke
A history joke Teacher: When was Rome built? Pupil: At night. Teacher: Why did you say that? Pupil: Because my Dad always says that Rome wasn't built in a day!
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Bar Joke - 2
Saddam Hussein's stockpile is deadly. The smoke from his biological weapons could mix with sulfur from his chemical weapons and create an atmospheric condition known as Los Angeles. The Los Angeles Board of Education has OK'd a plan to equip school police cars with guns. The plan works on a tier system: Police at elementary schools will carry supersoakers, junior high patrols will carry paint guns, and shotguns will be used at high schools. A severly disturbed geography teacher killed six people who did not know the capital of Scotland. Police say he's still on the loose and remind everyone that the capital of Scotland is Edinburgh. (Carlin) ATT announced last week it will lay off up to '8
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Job and Office Joke
Smith goes to see his supervisor in the front office. 'Boss, ' he says, 'we're doing some heavy house-cleaning at home tomorrow, and my wife needs me to help with the attic and the garage, moving and hauling stuff. ' 'We're short-handed, Smith' the boss replies. 'I can't give you the day off. ' 'Thanks, boss, ' says Smith 'I knew I could count on you!'
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Relationships Joke
A couple married forty years were revisiting the same placesthey went to on their honeymoon. Driving through the secludedcountryside, they passed a ranch with a tall deer fence runningalong the road. The woman said, 'Sweetheart, let's do the same thing we didhere forty years ago. 'The guy stopped the car. His wife backed against the fence, andhe immediately jumped her bones like a bass on a junebug. Theymade love like never before. Back in the car, the guy says, 'Darlin
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Bumper Stickers - 1
As long as there are tests, there will be prayer in public schools
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Note : Many of our jokes have been
submitted by guests - if you find any that are offensive please let
us know and they will be removed immediately. |
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