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No animals were eaten, killed, maimed, wounded, slightly
injured, experimented on, tortured, eaten, sacrificed, frightened,
bullied, teased, humiliated, tickled, upset, ravished, tantalized,
pulled out of a hat, dishonoured or criticised during the making of this
website. Some jokes however were severely tortured in an effort to make
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Welcome to our archive of jokes, riddles, poems and .
. . everything!!!
Over the years we have published over 100,000 jokes,
50,000 poems, 40,000 riddles, 20,000 pictures, 10,000 funny articles
and 2 combine harvesters.
So have a look around, enjoy and get those crops cut
as soon as possible!!!
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Joke Archive : 100,000 Fabulously Amusing Jokes |
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Archive of comedy writing jobs and other funny jokes |
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Computing Joke
Webster's Dictionary definition of Windows 95Windows95: n. 32 bit extensions and a graphical shell for a 16 bit patch to an 8 bit operating system originally coded for a 4 bit microprocessor, written by a 2 bit company, that can't stand 1 bit of competition.
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Friendship Joke
Two friends meet each other on the street. 'Hello! Where are you coming from?' asked Bill. 'Oh, don't ask me! I'm coming from the cemetery. I just burried my mother-in-law' replied Sid. 'I'm so sorry!' said Bill, 'But why is your face schratched all over?'. 'It wasn't so easy!' said Sid, 'She put on a hell of a fight!'
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Best Joke Online
Important Legal When a person assists a criminal in breaking the law BEFORE the criminal gets arrested, we call him an accomplice. When a person assists a criminal in breaking the law AFTER the criminal has been arrested, we call him a defense attorney.
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Funny Famous Joke
Dilbert's 'Salary Theorem' states that 'Engineers and scientists can never earn as much as business executives and sales people. 'This theorem can now be supported by a mathematical equation based on the following two postulates:Postulate 1: Knowledge is Power. Postulate 2: Time is Money. As every engineer knows: Power = Work / TimeAnd since: Knowledge = Power And: Time = Money , It is therefore true that Knowledge = Work / Money Solving this equation for Money, we get: Money = Work / KnowledgeThus, as Knowledge approaches zero, Money approaches infinity, regardless of the amount of Work done. Conclusion: The less you know, the more you make.
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Bumper Stickers - 7
Today's subliminal message is: ( )
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Spoof Joke
After a hot, hard day's work Joe went into a bar to quench his thirst. He walked up to the bar and asked the bartender for a beer. The bartender replied 'There's one thing every man has to do here before getting served. You have to tell me the name of your penis. 'Joe thought it was a bit silly and asked the bartender what he named his. The bartender said ' I named mine Nike. . . like you know. . . just go for it!'So he thought about it for a few minutes then said ' I got one. . . Secret. ' The bartender said 'Why Secret?' Joe said 'Well. . . it's strong enough for a man, but made for a woman. '
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Bumper Stickers - 3
How many roads must a man travel down before he admits he is lost.
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Knock Knock Joke - 3
Knock Knock!
Who's there?
Sabina.
Sabina who?
Sabina a long time since I saw you last.
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Note : Many of our jokes have been
submitted by guests - if you find any that are offensive please let
us know and they will be removed immediately. |
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