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No animals were eaten, killed, maimed, wounded, slightly
injured, experimented on, tortured, eaten, sacrificed, frightened,
bullied, teased, humiliated, tickled, upset, ravished, tantalized,
pulled out of a hat, dishonoured or criticised during the making of this
website. Some jokes however were severely tortured in an effort to make
them funny. |
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Welcome to our archive of jokes, riddles, poems and .
. . everything!!!
Over the years we have published over 100,000 jokes,
50,000 poems, 40,000 riddles, 20,000 pictures, 10,000 funny articles
and 2 combine harvesters.
So have a look around, enjoy and get those crops cut
as soon as possible!!!
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Joke Archive : 100,000 Fabulously Amusing Jokes |
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Archive of comedy newcastle and other funny jokes |
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Joke for Kids
Patient: Doctor, I feel like a bridge. Doctor: What's comes over you? Patient: 2 trucks, 4 vans and 8 cars
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Weather Joke
What type of sense of humor does a dust storm have? -A very dry sense of humor
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Poker and Gambling Joke
Bubba is put before the judge's bench because he is on trial for paying a prostitute for sex.
'How do you plead?' asks the judge, to the defendant.
'Not Guilty, your honor. '
Showing him a videotape of the alleged act, the prosecutor responds, 'How can you possibly convince the court of your innocence, if we have both the sex act, plus your subsequent payment to the alleged prostitute right here on tape?'
'Easy,' says Bubba, 'I'll admit to the court that although I wasn't engaged in an act of prostitution, I was committing another 'heinous' crime, gambling. '
'Gambling?' responds the prosecutor, 'How so?'
'Well you see,' answers Bubba, 'I went up to the young lady earlier that night as she was working in a topless bar and said to her, 'I'll bet you $200 that you don't get to have sex with me tonight'. That videotape is just footage of me losing the bet!”
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Christmas Joke - 2
Who sings 'Love me tender', and makes Christmas toys? Santa's little Elvis.
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Sports Joke
'My wife claims I'm a baseball fanatic. She says all I ever read about is baseball. All I ever talk about is baseball. All I ever think about is baseball. I told her she's way off base. '
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Fun Funny Joke
A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says. . . 'Why the longface?'
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Brother and sister Joke
Sister: Mom wants you to come in and help fix dinner. Brother: Why? Is it broken?
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Naughty Joke
A 70-year-old man has never been married. One day he meets a beautiful 17-year-old girl, and it is love at first sight. They get married and go to Florida for their honeymoon. When they get back, his friend says to him, 'So, tell me, how was it?''Oh, it was beautiful, ' says the man. 'The sun, the surf, we made love almost every night, we--'His friend interrupts him. 'A man your age! How did you make love almost every night?''Oh, ' says the man, 'we almost made love Monday, we almost made love Tuesday. . . '
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Note : Many of our jokes have been
submitted by guests - if you find any that are offensive please let
us know and they will be removed immediately. |
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