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bullied, teased, humiliated, tickled, upset, ravished, tantalized,
pulled out of a hat, dishonoured or criticised during the making of this
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Welcome to our archive of jokes, riddles, poems and .
. . everything!!!
Over the years we have published over 100,000 jokes,
50,000 poems, 40,000 riddles, 20,000 pictures, 10,000 funny articles
and 2 combine harvesters.
So have a look around, enjoy and get those crops cut
as soon as possible!!!
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Joke Archive : 100,000 Fabulously Amusing Jokes |
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Archive of comedy london and other funny jokes |
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Mad Joke
Once there were 3 Chinese mothers in a church. They always liked to compete with their sons. First mother: My son is a priest. Whenever people see him they say, 'Ohmy priest!'Second mother: Oh yeah, my son is a bishop. Whenever they see him theysay, 'Oh my bishop!'Third mother: (after thinking a bit) Well my son is a fat, lazy pig andwhenever people see my son they say, 'Oh my God!'
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Cowboy Joke
Why did the cowboy's car stop? It had Injun (engine) trouble.
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Law Joke
The devil visited a lawyer's office and made him an offer. 'I can arrange some things for you, ' the devil said. 'I'll increase your income five-fold. Your partners will love you; your clients will respect you; you'll have four months of vacation each year and live to be a hundred. All I require in return is that your wife's soul, your children's souls, and their children's souls rot in hell for eternity. '
The lawyer thought for a moment. 'What's the catch?' he asked.
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Cat Joke
What do you get if you cross a cat with a tree ? A cat-a-logue !
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Computer Joke
If you messed up your life, you could press 'Alt, Ctrl, Delete' and start all over! To get your daily exercise, just click on 'run'! If you needed a break from life, click on 'suspend'.
Hit 'any key' to continue life when ready. To get even with the neighbors, turn up the sound blaster. To 'add/remove' someone in your life, click settings and control panel. To improve your appearance, just adjust the display settings.
If life gets too noisy, turn off the speakers. When you lose your car keys, click on 'find'. 'Help' with the chores is just a click away. You wouldn't need auto insurance. You'd use your boot diskette to recover from a crash. We could click on 'send' and the kids would go to bed immediately. To feel like a new person, click on 'refresh'. Click on 'close' to shut up the kids and spouse. To undo a mistake, click on 'back'. Is your wardrobe getting old? Click 'update'. If you don't like cleaning the litter box, click on 'delete'.
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School Joke
Teacher: Can anyone tell me how many seconds there are in a year ? Pupil: 12 - 2nd January, 2nd February. . . !
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Halloween Joke
What happened when the girl dressed as a spoon left the Halloween party? No one moved. They couldn't stir without her.
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Accountant Joke
When do accountants laugh out loud? When somebody asks for a raise
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Note : Many of our jokes have been
submitted by guests - if you find any that are offensive please let
us know and they will be removed immediately. |
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