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No animals were eaten, killed, maimed, wounded, slightly
injured, experimented on, tortured, eaten, sacrificed, frightened,
bullied, teased, humiliated, tickled, upset, ravished, tantalized,
pulled out of a hat, dishonoured or criticised during the making of this
website. Some jokes however were severely tortured in an effort to make
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Welcome to our archive of jokes, riddles, poems and .
. . everything!!!
Over the years we have published over 100,000 jokes,
50,000 poems, 40,000 riddles, 20,000 pictures, 10,000 funny articles
and 2 combine harvesters.
So have a look around, enjoy and get those crops cut
as soon as possible!!!
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Joke Archive : 100,000 Fabulously Amusing Jokes |
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Archive of comedy events in london and other funny jokes |
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Bicycle Joke
What's the hardest thing about learning to ride a bicycle? The road.
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Kids Puns
Person: Are you a democrat or a republican?Blonde: Oh, I'm an American.
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Answer me this Joke
If CON is the opposite of PRO, is congress the opposite of progress?
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Worlds Best Joke
Q: What do you do if you come across an elephant in the jungle?A: Wipe it off and say you're sorry.
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Military Joke
General Heath, a famous lover of parade music and marching drill ceremonies, once listened to a symphonic orchestra playing. When asked about his impressions, he commented: 'No military precision in drill. . . ' 'Why?' 'Did you see those violin players? They were moving their bows not in cadence. '
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Joke Online
We hear you are a lady killer. They take one look at you and die of fright!! We heard that when you ran away from home your folks sent you a note saying, 'Do not come home and all will be forgiven'. You have a good family tree, but the crop is a failure. I don't consider you a vulture. I consider you something a vulture would eat. Is your name Amazon? You`re so wide at the mouth. You are a man who always sticks by his convictions. You will remain a fool no matter how much you get ridiculed for it! A dope you are and dope will remain. Completely unlike cocaine. You add to, not diminish, pain! We know that you would go to the end of the world for us. But would you stay there? Your family tree is good, but you are the sap. We all spring from apes, but you didn't spring far enough. It cost me five thousand dollars to look up your family history. A thousand to look it up and four thousand to hush it up. Lets play house. You be the door and I'll slam you.
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Birthday Joke
Something happened to me yesterday that will never, ever, happen to me again. How can you be so sure? I was 10 years old yesterday.
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Joke for Speeches
Spinach flavored Rice Cakes. Teeth removing Taffy Metamucil in a straw Ex-Lax Brownies Caramel Covered Zucchini Colored Crisco on a Stick Hot steaming bowl of pumpkin guts Chocolate Covered Prunes A Handful of Red Man Anything that ticks!
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Note : Many of our jokes have been
submitted by guests - if you find any that are offensive please let
us know and they will be removed immediately. |
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