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No animals were eaten, killed, maimed, wounded, slightly
injured, experimented on, tortured, eaten, sacrificed, frightened,
bullied, teased, humiliated, tickled, upset, ravished, tantalized,
pulled out of a hat, dishonoured or criticised during the making of this
website. Some jokes however were severely tortured in an effort to make
them funny. |
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Welcome to our archive of jokes, riddles, poems and .
. . everything!!!
Over the years we have published over 100,000 jokes,
50,000 poems, 40,000 riddles, 20,000 pictures, 10,000 funny articles
and 2 combine harvesters.
So have a look around, enjoy and get those crops cut
as soon as possible!!!
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Joke Archive : 100,000 Fabulously Amusing Jokes |
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Archive of comedy essex and other funny jokes |
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School Joke
How many students does it take to change a light bulb? None. Light bulb changing isn't in the course notes.
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Humorous Joke
This morning I felt that today was going to be my lucky day. I got up at seven, had seven dollars in my pocket, there were seven of us at lunch and there were seven horses in the seven o'clock race - so I backed the seventh. Did it win? No, it came seventh.
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Idiot and fool Joke
Did you hear about the Iranian terrorist who switched off the fans of his stolen helicopter because he couldn't stand the draft?
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Dentist Joke
What do you call the Scottish dentist ? Phil McCavity !
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Bar Joke - 1
John Smith lived in Staten Island, New York and worked in Manhattan. He had to take the ferryboat home every night. One evening, he got down to the ferry and found there was a wait for the next boat, so John decided to stop at a nearby tavern. Before long he was feeling no pain. When he got back to the ferry slip, the ferryboat was just eight feet from the dock. Smith, afraid of missing this one and being late for dinner, took a running leap and landed right on the deck of the boat. 'How did you like that jump, buddy?' said a proud John to a deck hand. 'It was great, ' said the sailor. 'But why didn't you wait? We were just pulling in!'
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Ethnical Joke
An old Indian lined up all of his 10 little Indian sons and stood in front of them. He then asked, 'Who push port-a-potty over cliff?'Nobody answered him. He then asked again, 'Who push port-a-potty over cliff?'Again nobody answered. The old Indian said, 'I tell story of Georgie and Georgie father. Georgie chop down cherry tree. Georgie tell truth, Big Georgie no punish. ' So the Indian asked again, 'Who push port-a-potty over cliff?'To which the littlest Indian replied, 'I push port-a-potty over cliff. 'The old Indian then shakes and spanks him, for his punishment. When he is done, the little Indian asks, 'Georgie tell truth, Georgie no get punish. I tell truth, I get punished. Why you punish, father?'The old Indian replied, 'Big Georgie not in cherry tree when it got chopped down!!!'
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Men Joke
How many honest, intelligent, caring men in theworld does it take to do the dishes? -Both of them.
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Vampire Joke
Why did the vampire enjoy ballroom dancing? He could really get into the vaultz.
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Note : Many of our jokes have been
submitted by guests - if you find any that are offensive please let
us know and they will be removed immediately. |
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