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bullied, teased, humiliated, tickled, upset, ravished, tantalized,
pulled out of a hat, dishonoured or criticised during the making of this
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Welcome to our archive of jokes, riddles, poems and .
. . everything!!!
Over the years we have published over 100,000 jokes,
50,000 poems, 40,000 riddles, 20,000 pictures, 10,000 funny articles
and 2 combine harvesters.
So have a look around, enjoy and get those crops cut
as soon as possible!!!
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Joke Archive : 100,000 Fabulously Amusing Jokes |
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Archive of comedy club milton keynes and other funny jokes |
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Farmer Joke
Q: Why did the farmer call his pig 'Ink'? A: Because it was always running out of the pen.
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Joke for Holidays
Although Cupid got all the girls hot, a great lover himself he was not. They would say, 'Sorry, sport, but your arrow's too short-- What we want is what Hercules' got. ' ---------------Euphemism is all very well, but if I really am going to hell, I'd rather it be for lechery, not for 'loving the ladies too well. ' -------------Juno's measure of fury was full, but Zeus had a trick he could pull. He said, 'Surely, my dear, whatever you hear from Europa is all cock and bull. ' ----------------Oh a pussy's a timorous beast, needing petting and patience at least, but she'll alter completely, if handled quite sweetly, and sit up and roar when she's greased.
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Just for Laughs Joke
Two country doctors out in the hills of West Virginia were discussing the population explosion in the world. One physician says, 'Why, Bubba, thiseyer crazy birth thang isa gettin' so bad that perty soon, they ain't gonna be room for ever'body! There'sa gonna be standin' room only on this here planet!'The other doctor replied, 'Heck, that sure oughta slow 'em down a bit!'
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Joke for Halloween
Look at each numbered item. Take one point for each one your remember. When finished, check your score below:1. Blackjack chewing gum2. Wax Coke-shaped bottles with colored sugar water3. Candy cigarettes4. Soda pop machines that dispensed bottles5. Hamburg joints with tableside jukeboxes6. Home milk delivery in glass bottles with cardboard stoppers7. Party lines8. Newsreels before the movie9. Slingshots10. Butch wax11. Telephone numbers with a word prefix (Olive - 6933)12. Peashooters13. Howdy Doody14. 45 RPM records15. S&H Green Stamps16. Hi-fi's17. Metal ice trays with levers18. Mimeograph paper19. Blue flashbulbs20. Amos and Andy21. Roller skate keys22. Cork popguns23. Drive-ins24. Studebakers25. Wash tub wringers=====================================================================If you remembered 0-5 = You're still young. If you remembered 6-10 = Kids are calling your sir/ma'am. If you remembered 11-15 = You're older than dirt!If you remembered 16-25 = Check your pulse now!======================================================================
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Real Life Joke
The following is supposedly a true story. To be included, besides being true, the story is most likely strange, weird, surprising, or funny. Monday, December '7
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Miscellaneous Joke
After Christmas break, the teacher asked her small pupils how they spent their holidays. One small boy's reply went like this:We always spent Christmas with Grandpa and Grandma. They used to live here in a big brick house, but Grandpa got retarted and they moved to Arizona. They go to a big building they call a wrecked hall. But if it was wrecked, it is fixed now. They play games there and do exercises, but they don't do them very well. There is a swimming pool and they go to it and just stand in the water with their hats on. I guess they don't know how to swim. My Grandma used to bake cookies and stuff, but I guess she forgot how. Nobody cooks there. They all go to fastfood restaurants. As you come into the park, there is a doll house with a man sitting in it. He watches all day so they can't get out without him seeing them. They wear badges with their names on them. I guess they don't know who they are. My Grandma said Grandpa worked hard all his life and earned his retardment. I wish they would move back home, but I guess the man in the doll house won't let them out.
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Idiot and fool Joke
IRS Agent: What's all this? Bracken: Well, you told me to bring all my records with me and I did. Here's some by Willie Nelson, Tammy Wynette, and Garth Brooks . . .
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Redneck Joke
You might be a redneck if the centerpiece on your dining room table is an original signed work by a famous taxidermist.
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Note : Many of our jokes have been
submitted by guests - if you find any that are offensive please let
us know and they will be removed immediately. |
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