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No animals were eaten, killed, maimed, wounded, slightly
injured, experimented on, tortured, eaten, sacrificed, frightened,
bullied, teased, humiliated, tickled, upset, ravished, tantalized,
pulled out of a hat, dishonoured or criticised during the making of this
website. Some jokes however were severely tortured in an effort to make
them funny. |
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Welcome to our archive of jokes, riddles, poems and .
. . everything!!!
Over the years we have published over 100,000 jokes,
50,000 poems, 40,000 riddles, 20,000 pictures, 10,000 funny articles
and 2 combine harvesters.
So have a look around, enjoy and get those crops cut
as soon as possible!!!
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Joke Archive : 100,000 Fabulously Amusing Jokes |
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Archive of comedy cards and other funny jokes |
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Priceless Joke
A Charlotte, North Carolina man, having purchased a case of very rare, very expensive cigars, insured them against . . . get this . . . fire. Within a month, having smoked his entire stockpile of fabulous cigars, and having yet to make a single premium payment on the policy, the man filed a claim against the insurance company. In his claim, the man stated that he had lost the cigars in 'a series of small fires. 'The insurance company refused to pay, citing the obvious reason that the man had consumed the cigars in a normal fashion. The man sued. . . and won. In delivering his ruling, the judge stated that since the man held a policy from the company in which it had warranted that the cigars were insurable, and also guaranteed that it would insure the cigars against fire, without defining what it considered to be unacceptable fire, ' it was obligated to compensate the insured for his loss. Rather than endure a lengthy and costly appeal process, the insurance company accepted the judge's ruling and paid the man $'15
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Stupid Blonde Joke
A blonde went to the appliance store sale and found a bargain. 'I would like to buy this TV, ' she told the salesman. 'Sorry we don't sell to blondes, ' he replied. She hurried home, dyed her hair, came back again and told thesalesman, 'I would like to buy this TV. ''Sorry we don't sell to blondes, ' he replied. 'Darn, he recognized me, ' she thought. She went for a complete disguise this time. A new haircut and newcolor, a new outfit, and big sunglasses. Then she waited a few days before she again approached the salesman. 'I would like to buy this TV, ' she told the salesman. 'Sorry we don't sell to blondes, ' he replied. Frustrated, she exclaimed, 'How do you know I'm a blonde?''Because that's a microwave, ' he replied. Sent by Ace
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Knock Knock Joke - 3
Knock Knock Who's there ! Chrysalis ! Chrysalis who ? Chrysalis the cake for you !
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Funny College Joke
Biddle and Payne, two elderly English professors, were having lunch in the cafeteria. During the course of the conversation, Biddle said, 'A student gave me a peculiar answer in class today. I asked who wrote the Merchant of Venice and a sophomore said, 'Please, sir, it wasn't me!' 'Ha, ha!' laughed Payne. 'And I suppose the little snot had done it all along!'
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Cow Joke
What do you get if you cross a longhorn with a knight? Sir Loin!
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Kids Puns
Whiy is six afraid of seven?Because seven eight nine!
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Dog Joke - 2
Why is it hard for Chihuahuas to type on a keyboard? They're all paws.
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Lawyer Joke
'You are a cheat!' shouted the attorney to his opponent. 'And you're a liar!' bellowed the opposition. Banging his gavel loudly, the judge interjected, 'Now that both attorneys have been identified for the record, let's get on with the case. '
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Note : Many of our jokes have been
submitted by guests - if you find any that are offensive please let
us know and they will be removed immediately. |
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