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No animals were eaten, killed, maimed, wounded, slightly
injured, experimented on, tortured, eaten, sacrificed, frightened,
bullied, teased, humiliated, tickled, upset, ravished, tantalized,
pulled out of a hat, dishonoured or criticised during the making of this
website. Some jokes however were severely tortured in an effort to make
them funny. |
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Welcome to our archive of jokes, riddles, poems and .
. . everything!!!
Over the years we have published over 100,000 jokes,
50,000 poems, 40,000 riddles, 20,000 pictures, 10,000 funny articles
and 2 combine harvesters.
So have a look around, enjoy and get those crops cut
as soon as possible!!!
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Joke Archive : 100,000 Fabulously Amusing Jokes |
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Archive of cheap fun days out and other funny jokes |
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Waiter Joke
Waiter, there is a frog in my soup ! Don't worry sir there isn't enough there to drown him !
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Animal World
A lady goes to her parish priest one day and tells him, 'Father, I have a problem. I have two female parrots but they only knowhow to say one thing. ' 'What do they say?' the priest inquired. 'They say, 'Hi, we're prostitutes. Do you want to have somefun?' 'That's obscene!' the priest exclaimed, 'I can see why youare embarrassed. ' He thought a minute and then said, 'You know, I may have a solution to this problem. I have two male parrotswhom I have taught to pray and read the Bible. Bring your two parrots over to my house and we will put them inthe cage with Francis and Job. My parrots can teach your parrotsto praise and worship. I'm sure your parrots will stop sayingthat. . . that phrase in no time. ' 'Thank you, ' the womanresponded, 'this may very well be the solution. ' The next day, she brought her female parrots to the priest'shouse. As he ushered her in, she saw this two male parrots wereinside their cage, hold their rosary beads and praying. Impressed, she walked over and placed her parrots in with them. After just a couple of seconds, the female parrots exclaimed outin unison, 'Hi, we're prostitutes. Do you want to have somefun?'There was a stunned silence. Finally, one male parrot lookedover at the other male parrot and said, 'Put the beads away, Francis, our prayers have been answered!'
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Space Joke
Teacher: What do you think astronauts wear to keep warm? Girl: Apollo neck jumpers ?
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Love and Marriage Joke
What's the difference between an Irish wedding and an Irish funeral? One less drunk.
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Bumper Stickers - 5
Learn from your parent's mistakes use birth control!
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Birthday Joke
I'm giving a 'surprised' birthday party for you. 'A 'surprised'. birthday party? What's that?' 'That's where I invite a bunch of your friends, and if any of them come, I'll be surprised!'
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Waiter Joke
And how did you find your steak sir? Well, quite accidentally. I moved this tomato slice and there it was
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Dirty Joke
Q: What do you call a brunette and three blondes in a corner? A: You don't, you see if you've got 3 condoms.
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Note : Many of our jokes have been
submitted by guests - if you find any that are offensive please let
us know and they will be removed immediately. |
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