|
|
|
The
Best Humor Sites on the Internet |
|
Christmas Jokes
Funny Jokes Online
MOCKERY
Ghost Pictures
Ghost Stories
Hilarious Horoscopes
Bizarre Webcam
notMENSA
society for the stupid
Cheap posters
Raunchiest Riddles
Worst Jobs in the World
Love Poems
Inspirational Poems
Funny Poems
Famous Poems
Free Diet Plans
Top Paying
Keywords
Keyword Suggestions
Everything you want to know about everything!
Weird eBay
mesothelioma types
Top 100 Baby Names
flowers online
Poker Articles
Free View Webcams
Work from Home
World History
Baby Name Chooser
Text Links
Online Advertising
Flowers
Top searches
Weird Website
Children's Books
Scottish Jokes
Robert Burns Poems
Midge Jokes
Fathers Jokes
Funny Jokes
Love Quotes
Famous Quotes
Inspirational Quotes
Funny Quotes
Movie Quotes
Friendship Quotes
Get Found
anime girls
5QS |
|
|
No animals were eaten, killed, maimed, wounded, slightly
injured, experimented on, tortured, eaten, sacrificed, frightened,
bullied, teased, humiliated, tickled, upset, ravished, tantalized,
pulled out of a hat, dishonoured or criticised during the making of this
website. Some jokes however were severely tortured in an effort to make
them funny. |
| |
|
|
Welcome to our archive of jokes, riddles, poems and .
. . everything!!!
Over the years we have published over 100,000 jokes,
50,000 poems, 40,000 riddles, 20,000 pictures, 10,000 funny articles
and 2 combine harvesters.
So have a look around, enjoy and get those crops cut
as soon as possible!!!
|
|
|
|
|
|
Joke Archive : 100,000 Fabulously Amusing Jokes |
|
|
|
Archive of charlie and lola fun and games and other funny jokes |
|
Village Idiot Joke
Why did Elton John wear a nicotine patch on his penis?Because he was trying to cut down to one fag a day!
= = = = = = = = = =
Bumper Stickers - 6
Smile, it's the second best thing you can do with your lips.
= = = = = = = = = =
Horse Joke
I bet on a great horse yesterday! It took seven horses to beat him.
The horse I bet on was so slow, the jockey kept a diary of the trip.
That was the first time I saw a horse start from a kneeling position!
My horse was so late getting home, he tiptoed into the stable.
The tipster said this horse would walk in. It did, but all the others galloped.
= = = = = = = = = =
Ethnic Humor
An Englishman, a Scotsman, and an Irishman are wandering through the desert, hungry and hallucinating, when they come upon a rotting, dead camel. 'Well, ' said the Englishman, 'I support the Liverpool football club, so I'll eat the liver. ' 'I support the Hearts club, ' said the Scotsman, 'so I'll eat the heart. ' 'I support Arsenal, ' said the Irishman, 'but I seem to have lost my appetite. '
= = = = = = = = = =
Money Joke
At the Cedar Rapids Chamber of Commerce meeting the treasurer reported a deficit of two hundred dollars. One of the chamber members stood up and said, 'I vote that we donate half of it to the Red Cross and then give the other fifty dollars to the Salvation Army. '
= = = = = = = = = =
Redneck Joke
Just as a surgeon was finishing up an operation and was about to close, the patient awakes, sits up, and demands to know what is going on. 'I'm about to close, ' the surgeon says. The patient grabs the surgeon's hand and says, 'I'm not going to let you do that! I'll close my own incision!'The doctor hands him the thread and says, 'Go ahead. . . Suture self'!
= = = = = = = = = =
Fun Joke
The US Standard railroad gauge (distance between the rails) is 4 feet, 8. 5 inches. That's an exceedingly odd number. Why was that gauge used? Because that's the way they built them in England, and the US railroads were built by English expatriates. Why did the English people build them like that? Because the first rail lines were built by the same people who built the pre-railroad tramways, and that's the gauge they used. Why did 'they' use that gauge then? Because the people who built the tramways used the same jigs and tools that they used for building wagons, which used that wheel spacing. Okay! Why did the wagons use that odd wheel spacing? Well, if they tried to use any other spacing the wagons would break on some of the old, long distance roads, because that's the spacing of the old wheel ruts. So who built these old rutted roads? The first long distance roads in Europe were built by Imperial Rome for the benefit of their legions. The roads have been used ever since. And the ruts? The initial ruts, which everyone else had to match for fear of destroying their wagons, were first made by Roman war chariots. Since the chariots were made for or by Imperial Rome they were all alike in the matter of wheel spacing. Thus, we have the answer to the original questions. The United State standard railroad gauge of 4 feet, 8. 5 inches derives from the original specification for an Imperial Roman army war chariot. Specs and Bureaucracies live forever. So, the next time you are handed a specification and wonder what horse's ass came up with it, you may be exactly right. Because the Imperial Roman chariots were made to be just wide enough to accommodate the back-ends of two war horses.
= = = = = = = = = =
Horse Joke
Why is horse racing so romantic? Because the horse hugs the rails, the jockey puts his arms around the horse and you can kiss your money goodbye!
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Note : Many of our jokes have been
submitted by guests - if you find any that are offensive please let
us know and they will be removed immediately. |
|
| |
|
