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No animals were eaten, killed, maimed, wounded, slightly
injured, experimented on, tortured, eaten, sacrificed, frightened,
bullied, teased, humiliated, tickled, upset, ravished, tantalized,
pulled out of a hat, dishonoured or criticised during the making of this
website. Some jokes however were severely tortured in an effort to make
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Welcome to our archive of jokes, riddles, poems and .
. . everything!!!
Over the years we have published over 100,000 jokes,
50,000 poems, 40,000 riddles, 20,000 pictures, 10,000 funny articles
and 2 combine harvesters.
So have a look around, enjoy and get those crops cut
as soon as possible!!!
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Joke Archive : 100,000 Fabulously Amusing Jokes |
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Archive of cam 2 cam fun and other funny jokes |
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Easy to Remember Joke
Suggestions for Guys Golfing or Using A Public Bathroom:Back straight, knees bent, feet shoulder width apart. Form a loose grip. Keep your head down. Avoid a quick backswing. Stay out of the water. Try not to hit anyone. If you are taking too long, please let others go ahead of you. Don't stand directly in front of others. Quiet please!. . . while others are preparing to go. Don't take extra strokes.
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Bible Joke
Cowboy Joe was telling his fellow cowboys back on the ranch about his first visit to a big-city church. 'When I got there, they had me park my old truck in the corral, ' Joe began. 'You mean the parking lot, ' interrupted Charlie, a more worldly fellow. 'I walked up the trail to the door, ' Joe continued. 'The sidewalk to the door, ' Charlie corrected him. 'Inside the door, I was met by this dude, ' Joe went on. 'That would be the usher, ' Charlie explained. 'Well, the usher led me down the chute, ' Joe said. 'You mean the aisle, ' Charlie said. 'Then, he led me to a stall and told me to sit there, ' Joe continued. 'Pew, ' Charlie retorted. 'Yeah, ' recalled Joe. 'That's what that pretty lady said when I sat down beside her. '
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Relationships Joke
Do you know why single women can't fart? Because, they don't get assholes untill they get married.
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Marriage Joke
Son: Is it true? Dad, I heard that in ancient China, a man doesn't know his wife until he marries.
Father: That happens everywhere, son, EVERYWHERE!
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April Fools Joke
I never do anything that i would get a referl in school for. So one day in 8th grade i asked one of my teachers to write me up. And he did. When i got home my mom was sleeping and my dad was in the living room. I handed him the copy that i got to take home and he read it. while he was reading it u gould see the anger building in him. Then he laughed at the end. My mom comes out of the room awhile later and reads it. While she is reading it she asks me questions like 'who was it?' And she luaghed at the end. A this is what it said i had been cuaght by three girls writing that a teacher sucks in the girls bathroom and that i would be suspended for a couple of days and that i would have to by paint to cover it up and at the end it said that i knew that this was a april fools joke my parent were pissed before they read that i knew it was a joke
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Joke for Kids
This guy dies and is sent to Hell. Satan meets him and shows him the doors to three rooms and says he must choose one of the rooms to spend eternity in. So Satan opens the first door. In the room there are people standing in cow manure up to their necks. The guy says 'No, please show me the next room'. Satan shows him the next room and this has people with cow manure up to their noses. And so he says no again. Finally, Satan shows him the third and final room. This time there are people in there with cow manure up to their knees drinking cups of tea and eating cakes. So the guy says, 'I'll choose this room'. Satan says O. K. The guys is standing in there eating his cake and drinking his tea thinking, 'Well, it could be worse', when the door opens. Satan pops his head around, and says 'O. K. tea-break is over. Back on your heads!'
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Joke Online
No, Windows is not a virus. Here's what viruses do: 1. They replicate quickly - okay, Windows does that. 2. Viruses use up valuable system resources, slowing down the system as they do so - okay, Windows does that. 3. Viruses will, from time to time, trash your hard disk - okay, Windows does that too. 4. Viruses are usually carried, unknown to the user, along with valuable programs and systems. - Sigh. . Windows does that, too. 5. Viruses will occasionally make the user suspect their system is too slow (see 2) and the user will buy new hardware. - Yup, Windows does that, too. Until now it seems Windows is a virus but there are fundamental differences: Viruses are well supported by their authors, are running on most systems, their program code is fast, compact and efficient and they tend to become more sophisticated as they mature. So Windows is not a virus. It's a bug.
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Ethnic Joke - 1
Q: Did you hear about the Mexico City earthquake? A: It did $100 million worth of improvements.
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Note : Many of our jokes have been
submitted by guests - if you find any that are offensive please let
us know and they will be removed immediately. |
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