|
|
|
The
Best Humor Sites on the Internet |
|
Christmas Jokes
Funny Jokes Online
MOCKERY
Ghost Pictures
Ghost Stories
Hilarious Horoscopes
Bizarre Webcam
notMENSA
society for the stupid
Cheap posters
Raunchiest Riddles
Worst Jobs in the World
Love Poems
Inspirational Poems
Funny Poems
Famous Poems
Free Diet Plans
Top Paying
Keywords
Keyword Suggestions
Everything you want to know about everything!
Weird eBay
mesothelioma types
Top 100 Baby Names
flowers online
Poker Articles
Free View Webcams
Work from Home
World History
Baby Name Chooser
Text Links
Online Advertising
Flowers
Top searches
Weird Website
Children's Books
Scottish Jokes
Robert Burns Poems
Midge Jokes
Fathers Jokes
Funny Jokes
Love Quotes
Famous Quotes
Inspirational Quotes
Funny Quotes
Movie Quotes
Friendship Quotes
Get Found
anime girls
5QS |
|
|
No animals were eaten, killed, maimed, wounded, slightly
injured, experimented on, tortured, eaten, sacrificed, frightened,
bullied, teased, humiliated, tickled, upset, ravished, tantalized,
pulled out of a hat, dishonoured or criticised during the making of this
website. Some jokes however were severely tortured in an effort to make
them funny. |
| |
|
|
Welcome to our archive of jokes, riddles, poems and .
. . everything!!!
Over the years we have published over 100,000 jokes,
50,000 poems, 40,000 riddles, 20,000 pictures, 10,000 funny articles
and 2 combine harvesters.
So have a look around, enjoy and get those crops cut
as soon as possible!!!
|
|
|
|
|
|
Joke Archive : 100,000 Fabulously Amusing Jokes |
|
|
|
Archive of buy silly putty and other funny jokes |
|
Worlds Best Joke
Washing The DogA young boy, about eight years old, walks into the local grocery store and picks our a huge box of laundry detergent. The grocer walked over, and trying to be friendly, asked the boy if he had a lot of laundry to do. 'Oh, no laundry, ' the boy said, 'I'm going to wash my dog!''But you shouldn't use this to wash your dog. It's very powerful and if you wash your dog in this, he'll get sick. In fact, it might even kill him. 'But the boy was not to be stopped and carried the detergent to the counter and paid for it, even as the grocer still tried to talk him out of washing his dog. About a week later the boy was back in the store to buy some candy. The grocer asked the boy how his dog was doing. 'Oh, he died, ' the boy said sadly. The grocer, trying not to be an I-told-you-so, said he was sorry the dog died but added, 'I tried to tell you not to use that detergent on your dog!''Well, ' the boy replied, 'I don't think it was the detergent that killed him. ''Oh? What was it then?''I think it was the spin cycle!'
= = = = = = = = = =
Dirty Joke
I love the lines men use to get us into bed. 'Please, I'll only put it in for a minute. ' What am I, a microwave?
= = = = = = = = = =
Doctor and nurse Joke
Did you hear the new penalty for speeding in Illinois? The first offense they give you Bears tickets and the second offense they make you use them.
= = = = = = = = = =
School Joke
How to write a paper1. Sit in a straight, comfortable chair in a well-lighted place with plenty of freshly sharpened pencils. 2. Read over the assignment carefully, to make certain you understand it. 3. Walk down to the vending machines and buy some coffee to help you concentrate. 4. Stop off at the third floor, on the way back and visit with your friend from class. If your friend hasn't started the paper yet either, you can both walk to McDonalds and buy a hamburger to help you concentrate. If your friend shows you his paper, typed, double-spaced, and bound in one of those irritating see-thru plastic folders, drop him. 5. When you get back to your room, sit in a straight, comfortable chair in a clean, well lighted place with plenty of freshly sharpened pencils. 6. Read over the assignment again to make absolutely certain you understand it. 7. You know, you haven't written to that kid you met at camp since fourth grade. You'd better write that letter now and get it our of the way so you can concentrate. 8. Go look at your teeth in the bathroom mirror. 9. Listen to your favourite cd and that's it, I mean it, assoon as it's over you are going to start that paper. 10. Listen to your other favourite cd. 11. Rearrange all of your cds into alphabetical order. 12. Phone your friend on the third floor and ask if he's started writing yet. Exchange derogatory remarks about your teacher, the course, the university, the world at large. 13. Sit in a straight, comfortale chair in a clean, well lighted place with plenty of freshly sharpened pencils. 14. Read over the assignment again; roll the words across your tongue; savorits special flavor. 15. Check the newspaper listings to make sure you aren't missing something truly worthwhile on TV. NOTE: When you have a paper due in less than 12 hours, anything on TV from Masterpiece Theater to Sgt. Preston of the Yukon, is truly worthwhile, with these exceptions: a) Pro Bowler's Tour b) any movie starring Don Ameche. 16. Catch the last hour of Soul Brother of Kung Fu on channel 26. 17. Phone your friend on the third floor to see if he was watching. Discuss the finer points of the plot. 18. Go look at your tongue in the bathroom mirror. 19. Look through your roommate's book of pictures from home. Ask who everyone is. 20. Sit down and do some serious thinking about your plans for the future. 21. Open your door and check to see if there are any mysterious, trench- coated strangers lurking in the hall. 22. Sit in a straight, comfortable chair in a clean, well lighted place with plenty of freshly sharpened pencils. 23. Read over the assignment one more time, just for the hell of it. 24. Scoot your chair across the room to the window and watch the sunrise. 25. Lie face down on the floor and moan. 26. Leap up and write the paper.
= = = = = = = = = =
Best Joke Online
Q: Why do Blondes take the pill?A: So they know what day of the week it is.
= = = = = = = = = =
School Joke
Teacher: I want you to tell me the longest sentence you can think of Pupil: Life imprisonment !
= = = = = = = = = =
Internet Joke
How do you find white shirts on the Internet? Use a starch engine.
= = = = = = = = = =
Animal World
Here's a sad one. . . Q: What do you get when you cross an elephant with a poodle? A: A dead poodle with an 18 inch asshole.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Note : Many of our jokes have been
submitted by guests - if you find any that are offensive please let
us know and they will be removed immediately. |
|
| |
|
